The graph compares employment rates in three sectors of the economy in the UK, 2000-2010 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparions where relevant.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The line graph provides information about the rate of employment in three sectors in the United Kingdom between 2000 to 2010.
It is clear that
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the self-employed and public
sector
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

increased
during
Change preposition
over

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
10 years, but the private
sector
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of the UK economy decreased at the same time
although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

it had the most amount of rates rather
to
Change preposition
than

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
the two other sectors. The amount of self-employed jumped around 12% during 10 years except from 2002 to mid-2003 witch it slightly declined.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, public
sector
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

rates rose as same as the self-employed section but went down by around one year from 2005 to 2006. In 2000, the private
sector
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

had the
most
Correct word choice
highest

There may be an adjective issue here.

show examples
proportion compared with other sections but dramatically dropped around 28 per cent and became the lowest rate in the UK economy in 2010.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sector with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • employment rates
  • economy
  • sectors
  • agriculture
  • manufacturing
  • services
  • trends
  • increases
  • decreases
  • comparison
  • highest
  • lowest
  • economic policies
  • technological advancements
  • global market demands
  • patterns
  • decade
  • significant changes
  • abrupt changes
  • stability
What to do next:
Look at other essays: