Some people think university education is important for getting a job while others believe it is more important to have experience and soft skills. discuss both sides and give your own opinion

There are different opinions regarding
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
university
education
, more specifically there are two groups of people with opposite thoughts. The first
group
believes that
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
education
is very important for getting a good
job
,
while
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
group
thinks that experience and soft skills are more fundamental
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
all types of
education
. Analyzing the thoughts of the first
group
, they probably think that, with
this
type of
choise
Correct your spelling
choice
, they could have more possibilities to find their dream
job
. Another important factor is the network you can create with other students at the
university
.
Then
, talking about the future
after
this
journey, there is a concrete possibility to work for the company you want and to reach higher salaries. Regarding the second
group
, they probably think that students waste their time because they don’t believe in the
university
system. They think that with more experience, your skills can grow up more
speedly
Correct your spelling
quickly
. For me,
this
side is totally
sense
Replace the word
sensible
show examples
, though it depends on the type of
job
occupation you want to reach. Having said that, in my opinion, the decision
of studying
Change preposition
to study
show examples
at the
university
is very personal and depends on your goals.
For example
, if your life goals are
indipendent
Correct your spelling
independent
from your
job
, you should ignore the
university
studies.
This
is a possible option because there are many people who don’t care about their
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
and prefer to concentrate
themselves
Remove the pronoun
apply
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on building a good family.
Instead
, if your life goals are related to money, you have to consider
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
university
education
.
This
type of
education
could accelerate your work career and permit you to reach important roles in the company of your dreams.
Submitted by mattiahsbubich on

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Coherence & Cohesion
To improve the logical flow, make sure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. This will help the reader follow your argument more easily.
Task Achievement
Use more specific examples to illustrate your points, especially when discussing how education or experience impacts job prospects. This will strengthen your argument and make it more persuasive.
Task Achievement
Ensure that each point you make about each side is supported with evidence or examples. This will help develop your argument more robustly.
Coherence & Cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that effectively frame the discussion, showing a clear understanding of the topic.
Task Achievement
You provided a well-balanced discussion of both sides of the argument, which demonstrates a good understanding of the issue at hand.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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