The government should encourage industries and business to move out of big cities and into regional areas. To what extent do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The national government should encourage big
industries
Use synonyms
should move into small
villages
Use synonyms
and
Correct word choice
as
show examples
it is
benefical
Correct your spelling
beneficial
for local people.There are a number of benefits,
although
Linking Words
there are some drawbacks when big
industries
Use synonyms
move into small
cities
Use synonyms
. The most important aspect to consider is that big
industries
Use synonyms
relocate to small
villages
Use synonyms
.
That is
Linking Words
it would be beneficial for urban [ areas}
cities
Use synonyms
because it would reduce traffic congestion and improve air quality. It would reduce space and improve the
qulaity
Correct your spelling
quality
of life
city
Change preposition
for city
show examples
people. Which leads to
improve
Wrong verb form
improved
show examples
overall
Linking Words
health.
Moreover
Linking Words
, big
industries
Use synonyms
establish
Wrong verb form
established
show examples
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
small
cities
Use synonyms
or
villages
Use synonyms
and
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
would develop infrastructure,
such
Linking Words
as roads,
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
, hospitals and job
opptunitie
Correct your spelling
opportunities
. They could access these facilities and
would
Verb problem
apply
show examples
improve
living
Correct pronoun usage
their living
show examples
standard
Fix the agreement mistake
standards
show examples
and they get high
salary
Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
show examples
from big
industries
Use synonyms
.
As a result
Linking Words
, Small
city
Fix the agreement mistake
cities
show examples
get
chance
Correct article usage
a chance
show examples
improve
Add the particle
to improve
show examples
their life. .
Moreover
Linking Words
, When big
industries
Use synonyms
are established in small
cities
Use synonyms
or
villages
Use synonyms
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
They it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
would develop infrastructure,
such
Linking Words
as roads, schools, hospitals and job opportunities. They could access these facilities and improve their living standard and they get high salaries from big
industries
Use synonyms
.
As a result
Linking Words
, Small
cities
Use synonyms
get a chance to improve their life.
However
Linking Words
, there are a few drawbacks, when
industries
Use synonyms
are established in small towns and it increases air and water pollution.It creates diseases ,and some people suffer from dangerous diseases
such
Linking Words
as asthma, blood cancer and other diseases .
Moreover
Linking Words
, it reduces forest land
agriculture
Replace the word
agricultural
show examples
lands, and animals, and impacts the
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
ecosytem
Correct your spelling
ecosystem
. As a consequence, it would be harmful
for
Change the preposition
to
show examples
the environment. In conclusion, there are a number of advantages when big
industries
Use synonyms
move into small towns,
such
Linking Words
as roads , hospitals and job opportunities,even though it would be harmful to
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
, causing land degradation,
water
Correct word choice
and water
show examples
and air pollution. I tend to believe that there are more benefits than disadvantages.
Submitted by harshdeepmakhan26 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Try to use linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your ideas.
task achievement
Ensure that your arguments are thoroughly developed and supported with more specific examples.
task achievement
Some sentences need restructuring for improved clarity and professionalism.
task achievement
Your essay addresses both advantages and disadvantages effectively.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are both well-presented.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: