Many governments have laws that ban the sale and use of hard drugs such as heroin and cocaine, yet they allow people to buy drugs such as tobacco and alcohol. Laws that prohibit the sale and use of hard drugs should be applied to all drugs, including tobacco and alcohol. What is your opinion?

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There is no denying the fact that hard
Use synonyms
drugs
Change the noun form
drug
show examples
utilization
is prohibit
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is prohibited
show examples
globally.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that
alcohol
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and
tobacco
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are allowed by some
governments
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, there is
also
Linking Words
an argument that
encourage
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encourages
show examples
to regulate
Wrong verb form
regulation
show examples
the
tobacco
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and
alcohol
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usage because they
considered
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are considered
show examples
drugs
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after all. In my opinion, I tend to believe that the sale and use of all
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
of
drugs
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includes
Wrong verb form
including
show examples
tobacco
Use synonyms
and
alcohol
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should
be regulate
Change the verb form
be regulated
show examples
by
governments
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.
To begin
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with, narcotics and controlled medication that
consider
Wrong verb form
are considered
show examples
as
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apply
show examples
a hard
Correct the article-noun agreement
hard drugs
a hard drug
show examples
drugs
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are already regulated
in
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by
show examples
all
governments
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for medical usage.
However
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, dealing with hard
drugs
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is
prohibit
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prohibited
show examples
in all
country
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countries
show examples
due to
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its effect.
In other words
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, banning
people
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from using these
drugs
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is a must, because it will
led
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lead
be led
show examples
to addiction if it
taken
Add a missing verb
is taken
show examples
with no medical reason.
For example
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, studies have proven that all hard
drugs
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will damage the brain cells of the addict. Another point to consider
,
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apply
show examples
is that addicted
people
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must allocate in specific facilities to contain their
dangers
Replace the word
dangerous
show examples
behaviors. It is
also
Linking Words
possible to say that,
governments
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cannot
banned
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ban
show examples
tobacco
Use synonyms
and
alcohol
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because
Change preposition
of its
show examples
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
adverse
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
not
Rephrase
apply
show examples
compared to hard
drugs
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.
For instance
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, smoking and drinking
people
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would not
consider
Wrong verb form
be considered
show examples
as addicted
people
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and they will not be affected
such
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as using hard
drugs
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. In conclusion, despite
people
Use synonyms
having different points of view, I'm convinced that
governments
Use synonyms
must totally prohibit all hard
Use synonyms
drugs
Change the noun form
drug
show examples
usage,
however
Linking Words
, the utilization of
alcohol
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and
tobacco
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shall
Verb problem
should
show examples
be regulate
Change the verb form
be regulated
show examples
to protect
the societies
Fix the agreement mistake
society
show examples
.
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You have a clear opinion on the issue, which helps build your argument.
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The essay structure is clear, with a logical progression from introduction to conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Chronic diseases
  • Substance abuse
  • Psychological dependency
  • Social stigma
  • Preventive measures
  • Legislative framework
  • Healthcare expenditure
  • Judicial system
  • Prohibition era
  • Civil liberties
  • Tax revenues
  • Harm reduction
  • Ethical considerations
  • Public health policy
  • Addiction treatment
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