Countries such as China, India, and Japan have unsustainable population growths. In fact, many experts are of the opinion that the population ‘explosion’ which is now a very worrying concern, is the most serious threat to life on this planet. Give some suggestions to address this problem
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There is no denying the fact that citizens number has increased incredibly in the
last
decade and continued until now. This
essay will discuss the concern about population explosion in some communities and suggest a number of solutions to relieve this
phenomenon.
To begin
with, there are many reasons behind this
huge growth. Firstly
, countries such
as China, Japan, and India rank the first level in terms of population ratio. In other words
, due to
social factors that attributed to the growth in the past and appreciation for the big families with the need for high individual rates to serve their land. In addition
, a high economic state in Japan , for example
, encourages them to increase the birth ratio. Medical status is considered to be the factor that plays an important role in childbirth more and more.
In terms of suggestions to solve this
incident, some societies took precautions and addressed regulations.
It is also
possible to say that Japan noticed the consequences and put strict regulations to limit the birth rate to 2 to 3 members per household. Moreover
, India has a low economic status in many cities, so the government could attract more visitors to raise the financial accumulation of the country.
In conclusion, there are many serious impacts on the planet as a result
of rapid population expansion in many aspects like wealth and health. It is also
true that people and government both contribute for
reducing the harmful effects.Change preposition
to
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task achievement
To achieve a higher score in task response, ensure that the essay provides more specific examples to support the main suggestions. This could involve detailing specific regulations or policies that have been successful or unsuccessful in controlling population growth in these countries.
coherence cohesion
For better coherence and cohesion, aim to enhance the logical flow between paragraphs. Ensure that each paragraph clearly links to the next, engaging the reader smoothly in the progression of ideas. Consider using linking phrases and transitional sentences more effectively.
task achievement
Improve the clarity of your main ideas by expanding on each point with further explanation and detail. This will help readers understand your perspective more thoroughly and enhance the essay's comprehensiveness.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, framing the issue of population growth well.
task achievement
There is a good attempt to address the reasons behind population growth and suggest solutions, covering key aspects of the task.
task achievement
The essay acknowledges the role of both individuals and governments in addressing the issue, showing a balanced view.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.