Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do

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A few
countries
suffer from a rise in the percentage of
crime
lot of people believe e that the
police
find and have been stopped on the streets leading to reduced
Crime
. I completely disagree with the
stat
Correct your spelling
statement
show examples
A few
countries
suffer from a rise in the percentage of
crime
lot of people believe e that the
police
find and have
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
stopped on the streets leading to reduced
Crime
. I completely disagree with the statement. In
this
essay will examine the plausibility of the notion and I will discuss my opinion. There are numerous crimes in all world
countries
.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the
police
have been finding anywhere, they could hide all crimes. To explain, policemen
Correct word choice
and police
show examples
police men
Correct your spelling
policemen
show examples
contribute to reducing
crime
in all
countries
such
as Kidnapping, and Smuggling.
For example
, a Study conducted by Oman
police
shows 99% of Royal could be eliminated from
crime
.
police
.
Thus
, they help them to reduce
crime
and live more
safety
Replace the word
safely
show examples
.
secondly
, the
police
aid and organise the street through traffic and to reduce theft.
In other words
, they are put in the regulation in all the street and
also
It
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
placed the punishment who the
lawbreaks
Correct your spelling
lawbreakers
law breaks
and
not
Add a missing verb
does not
show examples
obey the organisation regulation.
For instance
,
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
extensive research at Sultan Qaboos University demonstrates that 90 of Students must be and
it following
Wrong verb form
follow
show examples
regulation
Fix the agreement mistake
regulations
show examples
.
Also
, they
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
decline the theft and murder.
Therefore
, the Society society and
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
become safe and residing. In conclusion, It is argued that the
police
aid in reducing
crime
due to
It
Correct pronoun usage
Its
show examples
place of law
reglation
Correct your spelling
regulation
and
punchnent
Correct your spelling
punishment
also
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
leads to decreased types of
Crime
. I strongly agree with
notion
Add an article
the notion
show examples
.
Submitted by Loody on

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coherence cohesion
The introduction introduces the topic but lacks clarity. Aim to provide a clear thesis statement to improve coherence and task achievement.
task achievement
While you demonstrate a willingness to discuss your opinion, the arguments are not fully fleshed out, which affects the completeness of the response. Aim to develop your arguments further with more detailed examples.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your ideas flow smoothly. Try using linking words and phrases to enhance the logical structure of your essay.
task achievement
Your use of examples from Oman police and Sultan Qaboos University supports your points and strengthens your essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes an introduction and conclusion, which provides a clear beginning and end to your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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