Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do

#countries #rate #crime #people #police #streets

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A few

countries

suffer from a rise in the percentage of

crime

lot of people believe e that the

police

find and have been stopped on the streets leading to reduced

Crime

. I completely disagree with the

stat

Correct your spelling

statement

show examples

A few

countries

suffer from a rise in the percentage of

crime

lot of people believe e that the

police

find and have

been

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

stopped on the streets leading to reduced

Crime

. I completely disagree with the statement. In

this

essay will examine the plausibility of the notion and I will discuss my opinion. There are numerous crimes in all world

countries

Although

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

the

police

have been finding anywhere, they could hide all crimes. To explain, policemen

Correct word choice

and police

show examples

police men

Correct your spelling

policemen

show examples

contribute to reducing

crime

in all

countries

such

as Kidnapping, and Smuggling.

For example

, a Study conducted by Oman

police

shows 99% of Royal could be eliminated from

crime

police

Thus

, they help them to reduce

crime

and live more

safety

Replace the word

safely

show examples

secondly

, the

police

aid and organise the street through traffic and to reduce theft.

In other words

, they are put in the regulation in all the street and

also

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

placed the punishment who the

lawbreaks

Correct your spelling

lawbreakers

law breaks

and

not

Add a missing verb

does not

show examples

obey the organisation regulation.

For instance

Remove the article

apply

show examples

extensive research at Sultan Qaboos University demonstrates that 90 of Students must be and

it following

Wrong verb form

show examples

regulation

Fix the agreement mistake

regulations

show examples

Also

, they

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

decline the theft and murder.

Therefore

, the Society society and

community

Correct article usage

the community

show examples

become safe and residing. In conclusion, It is argued that the

police

aid in reducing

crime

due to

Correct pronoun usage

Its

show examples

place of law

reglation

Correct your spelling

regulation

and

punchnent

Correct your spelling

punishment

also

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

leads to decreased types of

Crime

. I strongly agree with

notion

Add an article

the notion

show examples

Submitted by Loody on Tue Nov 26 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

The introduction introduces the topic but lacks clarity. Aim to provide a clear thesis statement to improve coherence and task achievement.

task achievement

While you demonstrate a willingness to discuss your opinion, the arguments are not fully fleshed out, which affects the completeness of the response. Aim to develop your arguments further with more detailed examples.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that your ideas flow smoothly. Try using linking words and phrases to enhance the logical structure of your essay.

task achievement

Your use of examples from Oman police and Sultan Qaboos University supports your points and strengthens your essay.

coherence cohesion

The essay includes an introduction and conclusion, which provides a clear beginning and end to your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.5

4.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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Your opinion

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