Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do

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A few
countries
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suffer from a rise in the percentage of
crime
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lot of people believe e that the
police
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find and have been stopped on the streets leading to reduced
Crime
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. I completely disagree with the
stat
Correct your spelling
statement
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A few
countries
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suffer from a rise in the percentage of
crime
Use synonyms
lot of people believe e that the
police
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find and have
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
stopped on the streets leading to reduced
Crime
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. I completely disagree with the statement. In
this
Linking Words
essay will examine the plausibility of the notion and I will discuss my opinion. There are numerous crimes in all world
countries
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.
Although
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,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the
police
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have been finding anywhere, they could hide all crimes. To explain, policemen
Use synonyms
Correct word choice
and police
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police men
Correct your spelling
policemen
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contribute to reducing
crime
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in all
countries
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such
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as Kidnapping, and Smuggling.
For example
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, a Study conducted by Oman
police
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shows 99% of Royal could be eliminated from
crime
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.
police
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.
Thus
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, they help them to reduce
crime
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and live more
safety
Replace the word
safely
show examples
.
secondly
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, the
police
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aid and organise the street through traffic and to reduce theft.
In other words
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, they are put in the regulation in all the street and
also
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It
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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placed the punishment who the
lawbreaks
Correct your spelling
lawbreakers
law breaks
and
not
Add a missing verb
does not
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obey the organisation regulation.
For instance
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,
an
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apply
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extensive research at Sultan Qaboos University demonstrates that 90 of Students must be and
it following
Wrong verb form
follow
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regulation
Fix the agreement mistake
regulations
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.
Also
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, they
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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decline the theft and murder.
Therefore
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, the Society society and
community
Correct article usage
the community
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become safe and residing. In conclusion, It is argued that the
police
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aid in reducing
crime
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due to
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It
Correct pronoun usage
Its
show examples
place of law
reglation
Correct your spelling
regulation
and
punchnent
Correct your spelling
punishment
also
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
leads to decreased types of
Crime
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. I strongly agree with
notion
Add an article
the notion
show examples
.
Submitted by Loody on

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coherence cohesion
The introduction introduces the topic but lacks clarity. Aim to provide a clear thesis statement to improve coherence and task achievement.
task achievement
While you demonstrate a willingness to discuss your opinion, the arguments are not fully fleshed out, which affects the completeness of the response. Aim to develop your arguments further with more detailed examples.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your ideas flow smoothly. Try using linking words and phrases to enhance the logical structure of your essay.
task achievement
Your use of examples from Oman police and Sultan Qaboos University supports your points and strengthens your essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes an introduction and conclusion, which provides a clear beginning and end to your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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