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Writing Samples
Band 6

The table below shows the number of temporary migrant worker in four countries in 2003 and 2006 and the number of these workers per 1,000 people in these countries in 2006.

The table below shows the number of temporary migrant worker in four countries in 2003 and 2006 and the number of these workers per 1,000 people in these countries in 2006.
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The table illustrates the
number
Use synonyms
 of temporary migrant
workers
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 in
Australia
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, New
Zealand
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,
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom and
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 States in 2003 and 2006 and the
number
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 of these
workers
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 per 1,000 people in these countries in 2006. In general, the US
being
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
 the country with the highest migrants over the years,
while
Linking Words
 New
Zealand
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 shows the opposite. In 2003, the country with the most migrant
workers
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 was the US with 577,000
workers
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. Following on the second spot is
Australia
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 with 152,000
workers
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, the UK with 137,000
workers
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 and New
Zealand
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as
Change preposition
with
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 the least migrant
workers
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 with only 65,000 people.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in 2006, there
are
Wrong verb form
was
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 a significant
increased
Replace the word
increase
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of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
number
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 of migrant
workers
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 in these countries. Remained in the first position is the US with an
increase
Change the verb form
increased
show examples
 reach to 678,000
workers
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. Unlike in 2003, the second country with the highest
migrant
Correct quantifier usage
number of migrant
show examples
workers
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 in 2006 is the UK with around 266,000
workers
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, following
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 third place is
Australia
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 with 219,000
workers
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, and New
Zealand
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 with only 87,000
workers
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. In 2006, New
Zealand
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shows
Wrong verb form
showed
show examples
 the leading
number
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 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
workers
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 per 1,000 people with 21.1,
Australia
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in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 10.7 and both the UK and
US
Correct article usage
the US
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only
Change preposition
at only
show examples
 4.4 and 2.3.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 80%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, workers, australia, zealand with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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