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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

cxThe chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995-2002. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

cxThe chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995-2002. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#cxthe #minutes #billions #telephone #uk #three #categories #information #features #comparisons
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The
given
Verb problem
apply
show examples
bar graph illustrates the total
number
Use synonyms
 of
minutes
Use synonyms
 of telephone calls of three categories namely local-fixed
line
Use synonyms
, national and international fixed
line
Use synonyms
 and mobiles in the UK, from 1995 to 2002.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of local and
fixed
Add a hyphen
fixed-line
show examples
line
Use synonyms
 calls experienced an
increase
Use synonyms
 followed by a decrease. National and
intenational
Correct your spelling
international
 calls
gardually
Correct your spelling
gradually
increase
Use synonyms
 throughout the period. Mobile calls were not
much
Rephrase
very
show examples
 popular and started to
increase
Use synonyms
 slightly throughout the period. In 1995, approximately 70
billion
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
minutes
Change the noun form
minute
show examples
 telephone calls were made by local-fixed
line
Use synonyms
, and
this
Linking Words
number
Use synonyms
 started to
increase
Use synonyms
 and in 1999, around 90
billion
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
minutes
Change the noun form
minute
show examples
 calls were made.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
number
Use synonyms
 started to decline, and in the year 2002, the
number
Use synonyms
 of calls by
local-fixed
Correct your spelling
local fixed
show examples
line
Use synonyms
 reached
at
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
around 70
billion
Use synonyms
minutes
Use synonyms
. Meanwhile, in 1995, around 38
billion
Use synonyms
minutes
Use synonyms
 calls were made with national and international calls. After
that
Add a comma
that,
show examples
 the
number
Use synonyms
 started to
increase
Use synonyms
, and in the year 2002,
this
Linking Words
number
Use synonyms
 reached
at
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
around 50
billion
Use synonyms
minutes
Use synonyms
. In terms of mobile calls, in 1995, only below 10
billion
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
minutes
Fix the agreement mistake
minute
show examples
 calls were made, and it experienced a gradual
increase
Use synonyms
. In the year 2002,
this
Linking Words
number
Use synonyms
 reached its highest roughly 39
billion
Use synonyms
minutes
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by rahman_rehana on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, minutes, line, increase, billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 4 times.
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