Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
some
pupils
like to study
subjects
other than the main subjects
in their college, while
others think that staying focused only on the compulsory subjects
is essential. Advocates of the former opinion
say, that as the world is growing rapidly, students should have knowledge of all courses. The people with the latter opinion
argue that,
shifting focus from the main course is not fruitful and Remove the comma
apply
this
can cause failure. I think, pupils
should concentrate more on their actual field and once they have achieved their goal, they can study
other fields.
Supporters of the former opinion
believe that with each passing year ,new technologies are invented and for this
university graduates should remain in contact with other courses to remain updated about the recent changes in the world. For instance
, a friend of mine was enrolled in a Masters
program in health sciences, Change noun form
Masters's
Master's
however
, she studied Artificial Intelligence as a side subject and when she graduated she was recruited for a program based on artificial intelligence as a manager.
people with the latter argument think that,
it is beneficial to remain focused in one direction because studying multiple programs will Remove the comma
apply
deviate
attention and the person may fail the primary subject and they might have to repeat the course in order to achieve the required score. To illustrate, my brother was enrolled in the nursing program, perhaps he was interested in studying maths as well and ended up getting the lower band in his nursing school, for which he repeated 1 year to achieve the required score as he was focused on maths as well.
Verb problem
divert
To conclude
, studies are essential for every individual because the more you study
the more knowledgeable person you become, in my point of view, individuals should stay attentive to their primary programs in order to achieve their goals in life and once they have cleared all the exams they can study
other fields too.some pupils
like to study
about the subjects
other than the main subjects
in their college, while
others think that staying focused only on compulsory
subject is essential. Advocates of Add an article
the compulsory
former
Correct article usage
the former
opinion
says
, Change the verb form
say
as
the world is growing rapidly, Correct word choice
that as
so
students should have knowledge of all courses. The people with Correct word choice
apply
latter
Correct article usage
the latter
opinion
argues
thatCorrect subject-verb agreement
argue
,
shifting focus from Remove the comma
apply
main
course is not fruitful and Change the article
the main
this
can cause failure. I think, pupils
should concentrate more on their actual field and once they have achieved their goal, they can study
other fields.Submitted by dr.tehreemk on
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task achievement
Try to fully develop your main points by providing more detailed reasoning and evidence for each view.
coherence cohesion
Ensure transitions are smooth to make your essay easier to follow.
general
Use more sophisticated grammatical structures and vocabulary to improve accuracy and variety.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the discussion effectively.
task achievement
The author provides relevant examples to support the main ideas, such as the Masters program in health sciences and the nursing program example.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.