IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart shows the percentage of young people in higher education in 2000, 2005 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart shows the percentage of young people in higher education in 2000, 2005 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #percentage #people #education #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The bar graph illustrates the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of teenagers in higher
education
Use synonyms
 from 2000, 2005 and 2010 in various
Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
.
Overall
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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most young people
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
achieved
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the next
education
Use synonyms
is
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
country
Use synonyms
 D in 2010.
While
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
country
Use synonyms
 A
has
Wrong verb form
had
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 the least people who
get
Wrong verb form
got
show examples
 to higher
education
Use synonyms
 in 2000. Looking at the 2000 bar, teenagers in
country
Use synonyms
 A stood at nearly 40% which is the lowest per
cent
Use synonyms
 in every
country
Use synonyms
 and period. Meanwhile, in
country
Use synonyms
 B 40% of them are going to the next
education
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 and the rest
country
Use synonyms
are having
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half per
cent
Use synonyms
 of young people who chose to pursue their studies. Moving to the future, in 2010
country
Use synonyms
 A's teenagers going to higher studies
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased dramatically until slightly
hits
Wrong verb form
hitting
show examples
 60 per
cent
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.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
country
Use synonyms
 D gradually increased until made up to 80 per
cent
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 which is the highest
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 any
country
Use synonyms
. Whilst,
country
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 B remained as
last
Linking Words
 fifteen years ago and it
happen
Change the verb form
happens
show examples
 the same as
country
Use synonyms
 C which only increased a mere of 5 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by shantynr05 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words education, country, cent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage
  • trend
  • increase
  • decrease
  • notable
  • significant
  • comparison
  • higher education
  • young people
  • year-on-year
  • socio-economic factors
  • government policy
  • economic conditions
  • cultural attitudes
  • globalization
  • educational reforms
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