IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below shows the proportion of different categories of families living in poverty in Australia in 1999. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the proportion of different categories of families living in poverty in Australia in 1999. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#proportion #categories #families #poverty #australia #summarise #information #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The table illustrates the data about different types of families living in
poverty
Use synonyms
 in Australia in 1999.
Overall
Linking Words
, there are six
six
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
classifications, including single aged person,
aged
Add an article
an aged
show examples
couple
Use synonyms
,
singe
Correct your spelling
single
show examples
 without
children
Use synonyms
,
couple
Use synonyms
 without
children
Use synonyms
, sole parent and
couple
Use synonyms
 with
children
Use synonyms
. Categorically,
poverty
Use synonyms
 rates are higher for single persons compared to households with
husband
Correct article usage
a husband
show examples
 or wife. In terms of
Correct article usage
the totally
show examples
totally
Change the adverb
total
show examples
 situation of
whole
Correct article usage
the whole
show examples
Australia
Change preposition
of Australia
show examples
, there were 11% of households in
poverty
Use synonyms
 in 1999, with the accurate figure
was
Replace the word
being
show examples
 1837000. Those consisting of single aged
person
Fix the agreement mistake
persons
show examples
 figured at 6%(54000), which was
relatively
Correct article usage
a relatively
show examples
 low
poverty
Use synonyms
 rate
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 with
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, sole
parent
Fix the agreement mistake
parents
show examples
 and single without
children
Use synonyms
 were the most prone to be poor, at 21%(232000) and 19%(359000) separately. For families with partners,
Use synonyms
couple
Fix the agreement mistake
couples
show examples
 with
children
Use synonyms
 were the most common in
poverty
Use synonyms
, at 12%(933000),
while
Linking Words
 still approximately half of the highest.
Couple
Use synonyms
 with
children
Use synonyms
’s figure was lower, at 7%(211000). The proportion of aged
Use synonyms
couple
Fix the agreement mistake
couples
show examples
 was the lowest in families with partners but
also
Linking Words
 entire households, at only 4%(48000)
Submitted by fiasngs on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words poverty, couple, children with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: