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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many people believe that the government should encourage industries and businesses to move from large cities to the countryside. Do you think that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #government #industries #businesses #move #cities #countryside
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In urban areas, high population density is mostly common, which means there would be more use of cars and lower air quality.
This
 fact, makes some
people
 consider the government responsible for moving industries out of the cities for a healthier life, by lowering the density of the population. During
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
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 I am going to argue why I think
this
 is a smart move.
To begin
 with, major cities are often facing problems related to traffic jams, low air quality, waste dumps etc., which can mostly be fixed if companies and industries were to move to the countryside. In detail, by doing so, fewer
people
 need to transport to the city
centers
Change the spelling
centres
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 every day, resulting in lower
trafic
Correct your spelling
traffic
 and fewer exhaust fumes. It would
also
 decrease the number of
people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 are only there for their jobs, leaving more space for locals.
In addition
, some industries
such
 as iron smelting plants, release so many harmful gases like carbon and lead fumes that are really dangerous for human health. So, in my opinion, it is necessary that governments start
encourage
Wrong verb form
encouraging
show examples
such
 factories to move.
On the other hand
, there are
also
 some downsides to the displacement of companies.
For instance
, even moving a small factory, could take months and
also
 needs huge sums of money. In fact, selling the old land, moving the tools and machines, buying a new land and starting to build a new place, are some of the steps of
this
 decision, and each one of them needs great amounts of money and time.
Finally
, having said all the facts above, I believe that doing
such
 a thing can really benefit
people
 in most cases.
while
 it may cost a lot, it is needed for an
overall
 better life and health state for
people
 in the big cities. So I can say that the advantages of
this
 factor are far more than
it's
Correct your spelling
its
show examples
disadvanges
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
.
Submitted by Taha Sol. on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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