IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

It is important for all towns and cities to have large public outdoor places like squares and parks. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#towns #cities #places #squares #parks
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Undeniably, there are many Indoor activity
spaces
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 for
people
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 to use.
People
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 can take part in daily
activities
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such
Linking Words
 as exercise or play sports in the gym.
However
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, from my perspective, it is necessary to build large public open
spaces
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 in urban areas. It is obvious that outdoor places improve the social connection among citizens. To be more specific, the relationship among humans
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
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 to be
build
Wrong verb form
built
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by
Change preposition
as
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the
Correct article usage
a
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 way of communicating with each other. Outdoor activity space is a social link for
people
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. In fact, outdoor
activities
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 offer an opportunity for
public
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the public
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with
Change preposition
of
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 different ages and backgrounds to gather together to make friends
such
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 as square dance.
For instance
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,
According to
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 one study, compared with indoor
activities
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,
people
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 are more inclined to socialize in outdoor
activities
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, and making friends in outdoor
activities
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 is easier,
faster
Correct word choice
and faster
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. It is obvious that
people
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 can enhance their physical health by doing
activities
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 in a good outdoor environment. To be more specific, exercise is the most basic
needs
Fix the agreement mistake
need
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 of
people
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's bodies, whether it is children, the elderly or teenagers, they are inseparable from sports. Fortunately, outdoor sports meet their demands both physically and psychologically, it brings fresh air and open space.
For example
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, experts know from a large number of questionnaires that most
people
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 prefer outdoor
activities
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 to indoor
activities
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. In essence, based on the arguments offered above, large open
spaces
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 should be built considerately in towns and cities. In fact,
although
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 there are enough indoor infrastructures accessible for
community
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the community
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 to exercise, they do not provide the natural experience and environmental benefits of outdoor
spaces
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.
People
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 need access to nature, which is essential for their physical and mental health.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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