IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#aim #science #people #lives
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According to
Linking Words
 some
people
Add a comma
people,
show examples
 vital goal of
science
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 should be to develop
humanity
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. Nowadays we are living in the world that
science
Use synonyms
 established . Our life is
surrounding
Wrong verb form
surrounded
show examples
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
science
Use synonyms
.
That is
Linking Words
 why I firmly agree that
science
Use synonyms
 should
be improve
Change the verb form
improve
show examples
Use synonyms
peoples
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 lives. In
this
Linking Words
 essay I will discuss
this
Linking Words
 statement, how
science
Use synonyms
 was developed and
affects
Correct your spelling
effects
show examples
 on
Use synonyms
peoples
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 social aspects . The profound impact of
science
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 on
society
Use synonyms
 is evident in the way people access information today. In the past centuries
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
science
Use synonyms
 was unpopular even the community
prefered
Correct your spelling
preferred
 it
contrast
Replace the word
contrasting
show examples
 thing for them.
Moreover
Linking Words
, a postindustrial
society
Use synonyms
 was the improvement of
science
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. After industrial
Use synonyms
society
Add a comma
society,
show examples
 the countries
undertood
Correct your spelling
understood
understand
 the value of
science
Use synonyms
 and
then
Linking Words
 the governments funded
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
science
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because it improved the country,
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 population, a
society
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.
For example
Linking Words
 in
19th
Correct article usage
the 19th
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 century Japan was poor , a military country,
Correct word choice
and furthemore
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furthemore
Correct your spelling
furthermore
 the government was funded on
science
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especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
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on technology
Replace the word
in the technological
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 sphere. Now we can see
after
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 Japan had
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 rapid
increse
Correct your spelling
increase
 in
economy
Add an article
the economy
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and had
amount
Correct article usage
an amount
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 of profit
due to
Linking Words
science
Use synonyms
.
After
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this
Linking Words
science
Use synonyms
 has been working on
humanity
Use synonyms
. The spin-offs of
science
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 always helped
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
humanity
Use synonyms
.
In
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addition
Add a comma
addition,
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reserch
Correct your spelling
research
 works are helpful
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 spheres of healthcare.
For instance
Linking Words
, it helped when it was dangerous diseases in
19th
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the 19th
show examples
 century. When it was
Correct article usage
the first
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first world war
Correct your spelling
First World War
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 people died because of flu, and
then
Linking Words
 the
french
Capitalize word
French
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 scientist Paster discovered an antibiotic. It is an outstanding example of how
science
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developes
Correct your spelling
develops
Use synonyms
peoples
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 life.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
science
Use synonyms
 affects
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
space technology which
had
Wrong verb form
has
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huge
Add an article
a huge
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 impact on
humanity
Use synonyms
. The foundation of
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 was
an
Change the article
apply
show examples
impactful for scientists to develop their
science
Use synonyms
 works. In conclusion
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
science
Use synonyms
 should be
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 remarkable achievement
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
Use synonyms
peoples
Change noun form
people's
show examples
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
, and
did
Verb problem
apply
show examples
its aim to
improving
Change the form of the verb
improve
show examples
 it.
Submitted by nurymbetova.aray on

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clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure clarity in expressing ideas to strengthen the argument's impact.
logical structure
Focus on organizing paragraphs more logically to enhance essay flow.
complete response
Expand on examples and explanation to fully address all parts of the prompt.
relevant specific examples
The essay provides relevant examples that support the main argument, such as the impact of science on Japan's economy and healthcare advances.
introduction conclusion present
The writer successfully introduces and concludes the essay, wrapping up the discussion effectively.
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