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Band 7.5

the pie charts show the average consumption of food in the world in 2008 compared to two countries china and india

the pie charts show the average consumption of food in the world in 2008 compared to two countries china and india
#show #consumption #food #world #two #countries #china #india
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The charts provide information about the average amount of
food
Use synonyms
 intake by two regions, China and India compared to the world in 2008.
Overall
Linking Words
, processed
food
Use synonyms
 had the highest percentage in all three groups.
While
Linking Words
 the proportion of Nuts and seeds was extremely low in the World, it was higher than 10% in the remaining groups. As for other categories, all three groups were relatively had the same rates. In the two Asian countries, processed
food
Use synonyms
 took the lion’s share, which was in the vicinity of 30%.
This
Linking Words
 was followed by vegetables and fruits, which ranked second at 32% in China
whereas
Linking Words
 in India, it dropped to third place and was 9% lower.
However
Linking Words
, the consumption of animal
food
Use synonyms
 in China was lower than in India, one took up 15%
while
Linking Words
 the other was 12% higher.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the number of nuts and seeds intake in
two
Correct article usage
the two
show examples
 regions was relatively low, China’s was approximately 20%
while
Linking Words
 India’s took up the remaining 11%. In the world, processed
food
Use synonyms
 continued to be the major
food
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 consumption, at 41%. Vegetables and Fruits,
which
Correct pronoun usage
whose
show examples
 percentage was less than a
third,
Linking Words
stood at second place.
This
Linking Words
 was followed by animal
food
Use synonyms
,
which
Correct pronoun usage
whose
show examples
 rate was almost identical to India’s,
made
Correct pronoun usage
which made
show examples
 up 26%.
Finally
Linking Words
, the rate of nuts and seeds was trivial , which took up the remaining 4% and was the least category that people consumed.
Submitted by nphminh0207 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words food with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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