School should focus on teaching traditional subjects like history and math rather than practical skills like cooking or carpentry. Agree or Disagree give own opinion

#school #focus #subjects #history #math #skills #carpentry

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The debate over whether schools should focus solely on academic

subjects

Use synonyms

rather than include extracurricular lessons in their curriculum.

While

Linking Words

some

said

Wrong verb form

say

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that academic

subjects

Use synonyms

are essential for future careers,

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

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believe practical

skills

Use synonyms

are equally

importance

Replace the word

important

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for personal development. In my view, focusing on traditional

subjects

Use synonyms

will

be benefits

Change the verb form

benefit

show examples

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

228 words

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School should focus on teaching traditional subjects like history and math rather than practical skills like cooking or carpentry. Agree or Disagree give own opinion

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

online shopping has various advantages for consumers but may also have disadvantages, such as the loss of some individual privacy. do the advantages of online shopping for the consumers outweight the disadvantages ?

International tourism has brought about enormous benefit to many places .At the same time there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and environment . do disadvantage is outweight than advantages ?