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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the percentage of people who travelled by bus in the UK from 2009 to 2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the percentage of people who travelled by bus in the UK from 2009 to 2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#percentage #people #bus #uk #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The table below illustrates the proportions of citizens who used the
bus
Use synonyms
 for travelling in the UK between 2009 and 2011. In general, Using
Use synonyms
bus
Correct article usage
the bus
show examples
 for shopping and visiting friends
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 the
higest
Correct your spelling
highest
percentages
Fix the agreement mistake
percentage
show examples
 among other categories.
Whereas
Linking Words
,
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
 people used
Use synonyms
bus
Correct article usage
the bus
show examples
 for
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
 in all three years.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, The
number
Use synonyms
 of public who use
Use synonyms
bus
Add an article
the bus
a bus
show examples
 for shopping was 65 per
cent
Use synonyms
 in 2009.
Then
Linking Words
 the figure decreased slightly in the next two years and reached 51% in 2011.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of populations who
using
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
Use synonyms
bus
Add an article
the bus
a bus
show examples
 for visiting friends stood at 19 per
cent
Use synonyms
 in 2009 and 2010.
Then
Linking Words
 the
number
Use synonyms
 grew suddenly to 23% by 2011.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
There
Fix capitalization
there
show examples
 are only 4% of folk went to study by
bus
Use synonyms
 in 2009. The figure remained unchanged in 2010 and 2011 with 9%.
While
Linking Words
 people who used
Use synonyms
bus
Correct article usage
the bus
show examples
 for working was just 5 per
cent
Use synonyms
 in 2009. In 2010, the
percentages
Fix the agreement mistake
percentage
show examples
 declined slowly to 2%. In 2011, nobody used
Use synonyms
bus
Correct article usage
the bus
show examples
 for work.
In addition
Linking Words
, Using
Use synonyms
bus
Correct article usage
the bus
show examples
 for
day
Correct article usage
a day
show examples
 tour was only 7%
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
 the beginning of the period.
Then
Linking Words
rising
Wrong verb form
rose
show examples
 slowly to 12 per
cent
Use synonyms
 in 2010 and the
number
Use synonyms
 remained
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 in 2011.
Submitted by mrym05411 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words bus, number, cent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slowly" was used 2 times.
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