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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The graph below shows different sources of air pollutants in the UK from 1990 to 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. (20 mins.)

The graph below shows different sources of air pollutants in the UK from 1990 to 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. (20 mins.)
The graph
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
 the quantities of air
pollutants
Use synonyms
 from various sources in the UK
during
Change preposition
from
show examples
 1990
till
Change preposition
to
show examples
 2005.
Overall
Linking Words
, the total air
pollutants
Use synonyms
 decreased
along
Change preposition
over
show examples
 15 years.
Although
Linking Words
 industry and household
releasing
Replace the word
releases
show examples
 the
pollutant
Fix the agreement mistake
pollutants
show examples
 were
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
reduce
Wrong verb form
reduced
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
,
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 prone of transport was stationary. In 1990, the highest value of the pollutant’s source was nearly 6
million
Use synonyms
tons
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 came from industry,
while
Linking Words
 the household and transport
were
Check wording
sectors were
show examples
 around 1
million
Use synonyms
tons
Use synonyms
. After 1990, the
pollutants
Use synonyms
 generated by the
manufactory
Check wording
manufacturing
show examples
 subsided significantly to around 3
million
Use synonyms
tons
Use synonyms
 in 1996, and they
still were
Correct word order
were still
show examples
 reduced in releasing them continuously till 2005 at nearly 2
million
Use synonyms
tons
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the haulage
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
remained
the
Change preposition
at the
show examples
 level of the
pollutants
Use synonyms
 around 1
million
Use synonyms
tons
Use synonyms
 in 15 years.
However
Linking Words
, the
domesticate
Replace the word
domestication
show examples
also
Linking Words
 mitigated the amount of the
pollutants
Use synonyms
 as well. So, the summation of
pollutants
Use synonyms
 from every source was nearly 7
million
Use synonyms
tons
Use synonyms
 in 1996, and
then
Linking Words
 it reduced significantly in the next 10 years to approximately 4
million
Use synonyms
tons
Use synonyms
.
Next,
Linking Words
it
Correct pronoun usage
there
show examples
 was
perpentually
Rephrase
apply
show examples
a
decrease
Correct word choice
perpetual decrease
show examples
 in 2005 at belove 4
million
Use synonyms
tons
Use synonyms
.

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words pollutants, million, tons with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reduce" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • air pollutants
  • emissions
  • decrease
  • increase
  • stable
  • fluctuate
  • trend
  • peak
  • drop
  • significant
  • legislation
  • technological advancements
  • comparative analysis
  • contributors
  • households
  • transport
  • industry
  • regulation
  • pattern
  • anomaly
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