IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The pictures show a museum which some history part in two distinct years, in 2010 and 2013. summarise

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The pictures illustrate a museum which contains
nctural
Correct your spelling
natural
 history in two distinct years, in 2010 and 2013.
Overall
Linking Words
.
it is clear that
Linking Words
 trees
cut
Add a missing verb
were cut
show examples
Correct your spelling
down
show examples
dawn
Correct your spelling
down
show examples
 and
Use synonyms
mammals
Fix the agreement mistake
mammal
show examples
 area was replaced from on the left of the map to the right and some
Correct your spelling
facilities
fisilities
Correct your spelling
facilities
 and
structure
Fix the agreement mistake
structures
show examples
 were added in 2013
Firstlv
Correct your spelling
First
. in 2010 there
had been
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 aarden on the right of the man and they were chopped
dawn
Correct your spelling
down
show examples
 and replaced ov
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
nuge
Correct your spelling
huge
 area that
containd
Correct your spelling
contained
contains
mammals
Use synonyms
. shop. cate and numan origins
displav
Correct your spelling
display
.it
nas
Correct your spelling
has
 to be pointed out
although
Linking Words
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
mammals
a mammal
show examples
mammals
Use synonyms
 had been in 2010, it was replaced to another side.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the ice age exhibition was changed by
mammals
Use synonyms
 on the right corner of
map
Add an article
the map
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
, the insects
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 added to
museum
Add an article
the museum
show examples
 in 2013. on
corner
Add an article
the corner
show examples
 of
ice
Correct your spelling
Ice Afe
show examples
afe
Correct your spelling
are
 exhibition
In contrast
Linking Words
, some areas like
ocean
Correct article usage
the ocean
show examples
 hall, lobby, ticket desk and dinosaur hall
remaind
Correct your spelling
remained
remain
 over time. The entrance did not have
changing
Replace the word
change
show examples
 and in both years it was
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the bottom of the maps.

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coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence, consider structuring your essay more clearly by organizing the information into distinct paragraphs with clear topic sentences. This will improve the flow of information and make it easier for readers to follow your main points.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and details to fully support your descriptions and comparisons of the changes observed in the museum over the years.
accuracy
Ensure correct use of vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'garden' instead of 'aarden', 'cut down' instead of 'cut dawn', and use 'facilities' instead of 'fisilities' to avoid any confusion.
task achievement
The essay clearly identifies the main changes in the museum from 2010 to 2013, providing a good overview of the topic and showing attention to detail in the depicted differences.
introduction conclusion present
You noted the overall changes effectively, providing a clear summary in your first paragraph which is a positive way to start your essay. Good job including an introduction despite minor inaccuracies.
complete response
You included a comparison of different areas of the museum between the two years, which is important for demonstrating a full response to the task. Keep up this analytical approach!

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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