People doing dangerous sports activities like scuba diving and bungi jumping, they should be responsible for their own life and rescue workers should not risk their lives to save people. Do you agree or disagree?
Humans doing dangerous sports activities should be responsible for their own
life
and others. I strongly agree that Fix the agreement mistake
lives
people
must be aware of their attitude and how it reflects on other Use synonyms
people
. Use synonyms
In
Change preposition
This
this
academic essay will highlight why Linking Words
people
should increase their awareness about Use synonyms
this
topic, provides evidence with examples, and Linking Words
strong
conclusion.
There are numerous reasons that make humans reject Add an article
a strong
the
dangerous activities. Correct article usage
apply
Firstly
, these Linking Words
sporst
lead to Correct your spelling
sports
disaster
of the human lives. To illustrate, hobbies that focus on random movement lead to death. Add an article
a disaster
the disaster
Moreover
, scuba diving and Linking Words
bungi
jumping are the key reason to let many Correct your spelling
bungee
people
have diseases in the past. Use synonyms
For instance
, Ahmed Al Linking Words
Khaild
Correct your spelling
Khalid
which
was the famous Correct pronoun usage
who
siwimmer
in Kuwait in 1890 faced numerous health Correct your spelling
swimmer
swimmers
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
becouse
Correct your spelling
because
his
activity.
Change preposition
of his
On the other hand
, the rescue workers must not be responsible for what humans Linking Words
choices
. They believe that adults should take Replace the word
choose
thei
opinions, choices ,and feelings Correct your spelling
their
the
by
their own without Change preposition
on
ant
external effect. Correct your spelling
any
Additionlly
, employers who Correct your spelling
Additionally
works
in these jobs Change the verb form
work
are already have
the experience Change the verb form
already have
how
to deal with them in these actions. Change preposition
of how
For example
, In Italy, they provide Linking Words
the
workers Correct article usage
apply
free
Change preposition
with free
onilne
courses Correct your spelling
online
how
to communicate with Change preposition
on how
people
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
with
unpleasent
Correct your spelling
unpleasant
attitude
, issues and, daily lifestyle Fix the agreement mistake
attitudes
problem
.
In conclusion, Fix the agreement mistake
problems
people
must take these Use synonyms
proplem
or dangerous sports into consideration Correct your spelling
problems
becouse
it Correct your spelling
because
is lead
to Wrong verb form
leads
huge
Add an article
a huge
the huge
problem
that we can not manage Fix the agreement mistake
problems
it
after Correct pronoun usage
apply
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
happened
. Wrong verb form
happen
Additionlly
, I would Correct your spelling
Additionally
recommand
Correct your spelling
recommend
to take
the first step which Change the verb form
taking
join
Wrong verb form
is joining
these kind
of courses which increase the human mind.Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
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task achievement
Your essay touches on the topic, but it would benefit from deeper exploration and understanding of all aspects related to dangerous sports and the consequences of participating in them. Consider expanding your discussion to include counter-arguments and addressing them.
coherence cohesion
Improve the clarity and organization of your ideas. Each paragraph should have a clear central point that supports the thesis, and transitions between ideas should be smooth. Additionally, ensure that each argument is well-supported with clear evidence or examples.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay begins with a clear position on the topic, which is essential for a strong introduction.
coherence cohesion
You have structured your essay to include an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which provides an organized framework.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.