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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The line graph shows the growth in the population of UK from 1971 to 2006 and projections until 2031. The pie chart shows the population of different nationalities in the UK in the year 2006. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph shows the growth in the population of UK from 1971 to 2006 and projections until 2031. The pie chart shows the population of different nationalities in the UK in the year 2006. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#line #growth #population #uk #projections #nationalities #year #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The line graph gives the information about
population
Add an article
the population
a population
show examples
 of the
british
Change the capitalization
British
show examples
 country including
England
Use synonyms
,
London
Use synonyms
,
rest
Correct article usage
the rest
show examples
 of
England
Use synonyms
 from 1971 to 2006 and projections until 2031.
Overall
Linking Words
, from year to
year
Add a comma
year,
show examples
 all
participats
Correct your spelling
participants
 pitch in
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
experience growth. At the
begining
Correct your spelling
beginning
 of
year
Add an article
the year
show examples
,
England
Use synonyms
was
Verb problem
contributed
show examples
 the most
contribute
Verb problem
apply
show examples
to the
populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
show examples
, followed by
rest
Correct article usage
the rest
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
london
Change the capitalization
London
show examples
, meanwhile
London
Use synonyms
 was the least significant part which
contribute
Wrong verb form
contributed
show examples
 to the
populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
show examples
. Look closely
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the graph, at the
begining
Correct your spelling
beginning
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 2010,
England
Use synonyms
initiate
Wrong verb form
initiated
show examples
 over 1500 and gradually increased for 4 years,
then
Linking Words
 sharply
boost
Wrong verb form
boosted
show examples
 to the
peek
Correct your spelling
peak
show examples
 reaching
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
almost 4500 in 2016. Rest of
Use synonyms
england
Change the capitalization
England
show examples
 which
partipate
Correct your spelling
participate
substantial
Change the word
substantially
show examples
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the chart that in 2020,
initially
Linking Words
 it counted about 1600 people
then
Linking Words
 experienced
Correct article usage
a progressively
show examples
progressively
Change the word
progressive
show examples
 increase until 2014 to 2000 people,
then
Linking Words
 extremely expanded
double
Wrong verb form
doubled
show examples
 from the
begining
Correct your spelling
beginning
 reach to 3000 citizens.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
London
Use synonyms
which
Correct your spelling
with
show examples
 the least
participant
Fix the agreement mistake
participants
show examples
facing
Wrong verb form
faced
show examples
steady
Correct article usage
a steady
show examples
 during 3 years at 500, but
then
Linking Words
 slowly
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 for 2 years to 1000 subjects
then
Linking Words
remind
Verb problem
remained
show examples
 steady until 2016.
Submitted by masry.pakpahan on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words england, london with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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