Some people think that cultural traditions will be destroyed when they are used to make money from tourists. Others believe that this is the only way for some places to survive in today's world. Discuss both sides and give you opinion.

#people #traditions #money #tourists #places #world

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These days, the public has various perspectives about saving their social norms. A group of them think that it is on the brink of traditional extinction when showing them to visitors to earn

money

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while

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others believe

that is

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the best way to save some places in the new era. In my opinion, the second idea is the best one owing to the fact that saving cultural diversity and old areas needs

money

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;

moreover

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, tourists have an economic impact on people's lives. On the one hand, if people show their customs to earn

money

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from travellers, they do not perform some of them that passengers do not like. In fact,

this

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work follows just traditions which are really charming to foreign communities

instead

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of saving them.

In addition

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this

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leads to the goods for earning not saving their original meaning.

On the other hand

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, the fact

that is

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really crucial is that in the modern era, saving culture from alternating to the westernised requires a great deal of budget;

as a result

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, society has to hold their ceremonies so fascinating to attract tourists in their country for economy growth that can change the situation of old buildings that will be destroyed.

Furthermore

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, the tourist industry creates a chance for local inhabitants to have a good income.

To sum up

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, the traditional norms that tourists prefer might become extinct in some sections of culture.

However

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money

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is the main factor that prevents cultural erosion and helps populations inasmuch as rebeuild ancient places and customs, which are the aspects of culture, that need a lot of

money

Use synonyms

Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on Tue Jan 07 2025

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task achievement

Consider including more specific examples or evidence to strengthen your arguments. This will help support your points more effectively.

task achievement

Clarify some of the points to ensure your ideas are easily comprehensible. Reading the essay out loud can help you spot areas that might need simplification.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph is clearly linked to the next to improve overall coherence. This can often be done by using transitional phrases.

coherence cohesion

The essay provides a clear introduction to the topic and states your opinion effectively.

task achievement

You have addressed both sides of the argument thoroughly, which demonstrates a good understanding of the topic.

coherence cohesion

The structure of the essay is logical, with clear sections for different points of view.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

265 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural integrity
commercialization
commodification
authenticity
tourist-friendly versions
original meaning
context
extinction
global appreciation
global connectedness
economically disadvantaged regions

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Some people think that cultural traditions will be destroyed when they are used to make money from tourists. Others believe that this is the only way for some places to survive in today's world. Discuss both sides and give you opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Money spent on space exploration is a complete waste. Governments could better spend this money on other things to benefit the nation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicle will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others belive it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification

an increasing number of people choose to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve their appearance. Why do people want to change the way they look? And Is it a positive or negative development?