IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

ou recently stayed in a hotel in a large city. The weather was very unusual for the time of year and the heating / cooling system in the hotel was quite inadequate. Write a letter to the manager of the hotel. In your letter: give details of what went wrong explain what you had to do to overcome the problem at the time say what action you would like the manager to take You do NOT need to write your own address.

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DEAR MANAGER, I hope
this
Linking Words
 letter finds you well, I am
Pooja
Correct article usage
a Pooja
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 Practicing Lawyer,residing at Anna
nagar west
Correct your spelling
Nagar West
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, Thirumangalam which is
prominent
Correct article usage
a prominent
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 locality,where
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
am
Verb problem
have been
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 living for several years. I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to express my dissatisfaction. I
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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booked your hotel for
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 best holiday stay, but it has become
worst
Correct article usage
the worst
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experence
Correct your spelling
experience
,
Linking Words
further more
Correct your spelling
furthermore
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 the room heater did not work,I intimated to the reception but no
responce
Correct your spelling
response
 from your end,more over the food served was not good, no hospitality from the housekeeping and restaurant was not clean.It does not feel like
3 star
Add a hyphen
3-star
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 hotel,
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
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 a fraud or scam to grab money from people. I would like to get a discount on the bill
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 because I was not satisfied with the
ambiance
Change the spelling
ambience
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 and the meal. I will be waiting for a positive reply from your end Thank you yours faithfully R.POOJA

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Coherence and Cohesion
Improve logical structure by organizing ideas in a more structured manner. Consider using paragraphs more effectively to separate different points.
Task Achievement
Maintain a professional and polite tone throughout the letter despite negative experiences, as this enhances the possibility of a positive response.
Task Achievement
Include more specific suggestions on how you would like the manager to provide compensation or resolve the issue, to strengthen your request.
Task Achievement
The letter clearly outlines the problems experienced during the stay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Uses a polite opening and closing, addressing the manager properly.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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