IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The chart shows the average number of hours each day that Chinese, American, Turkish and Brazilian tourists spent doing leisure activities while on holiday in Greece in August 2019

The chart shows the average number of hours each day that Chinese, American, Turkish and Brazilian tourists spent doing leisure activities while on holiday in Greece in August 2019
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar chart provides key information about how many
hours
Use synonyms
 spent a day by
tourists
Use synonyms
 from China,
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
, Turkey and Brazil
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
 leisure activities
while
Linking Words
 on vacation in Greece during August 2019. The
unites
Replace the word
units
show examples
 are measured in the
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of
hours
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the graph that Chinese
tourists
Use synonyms
 spent the majority of their leisure activities
hours
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
books reading.
In addition
Linking Words
, Turkish and Brazilian
tourists
Use synonyms
 have approximately similar interests when it comes to dividing
hours
Use synonyms
 of leisure activities
whereas
Linking Words
, Chinese and American
tourists
Use synonyms
 have that in common.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words hours, tourists with synonyms.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • average number
  • leisure activities
  • tourists
  • nationalities
  • cultural trends
  • interests
  • vacation
  • influence
  • participation
  • impact
  • weather
  • events
  • festivals
What to do next:
Look at other essays: