IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects.Others believe it is more importatnt to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. discuss both these views and give your opinion

#university #students #subjects #addition #importatnt #time #attention #qualification
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While
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 some scholars believe that it is important that they study additional
subjects
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aprat
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apart
 from their focussed
subjects
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,
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while
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apply
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some argue that it is crucial to put their fullest effort
gaining
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into gaining
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 a
qualification
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.Understanding these view
ponts
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points
point
 is important, as they not only affect student's life challenges but
also
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 navigate our personal skills. On
one
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the one
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 hand, it is
benificial
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beneficial
 to gain some extra knowledge in different areas as it helps develop our interpersonal skills.
For instance
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, some universities offer
veraity
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variety
veracity
 of languages as additional
subjects
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.Mastering a
foriengn
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foreign
 language can increase
the
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apply
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career
potentials
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potential
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 after
the
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apply
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university.
Adiitionally
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Additionally
, having
the
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apply
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knowledge in different fields
enhance
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enhances
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 life skills.It is important for
student
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students
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 to explore ,
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in inorder
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inorder
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order
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 to achieve greater success in future.
On the other hand
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, one can argue that it is more advantageous only to focus
gaining
Change preposition
on gaining
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 a
qualification
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.
Fpr
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For
 example,
now a days
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
 students do not have enough time to study additional
subjects
Use synonyms
 as the main streams are too broad. Not being able to give their full attention and time to the main
subjects
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 can be disadvantageous in their final result.
Therefore
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, one can believe it is crucial to give their attention to achieve a
qualification
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.
According to
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 my point of view, there should be a balance between these two sides.
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Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
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 a person is complete when he has
Use synonyms
qualification
Fix the agreement mistake
qualifications
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as well as
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 extra knowledge in
variety
Add an article
a variety
show examples
 of fields.
Submitted by lakshika.hrt on

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Supported Main Points
Ensure all main points are well-supported with detailed examples and evidence as it helps in substantiating your argument.
Logical Structure
Work on organizing ideas logically within paragraphs to connect your main and supporting ideas better.
Complete Response
Be mindful of your language and grammar, as this affects clarity.
Complete Response
The essay presents a balanced discussion by addressing both views and offering a clear personal opinion.
Introduction Conclusion Present
The introduction and conclusion are clear, setting a good framework for the essay.
Clear Comprehensive Ideas
The essay reflects an understanding of the topic and appropriately discusses the importance of balancing acquiring qualifications and extra skills.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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