IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In many places, new homes are needed, but only place available for building them is in the counrtyside. Some people bellive it is more important to protect the countyside and not building new homes there . What it your opinion about this?

#places #homes #place #counrtyside #people #bellive #countyside
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Modern apartments are necessary for every area, but only in the
countryside
Use synonyms
 place
exist
Correct subject-verb agreement
exists
show examples
 to build it. One of the crucial things is covering the villages and
Linking Words
this kind
Fix the agreement mistake
these kinds
show examples
 of
places
Use synonyms
 from the damage to buildings. We have many locations
sto
Correct your spelling
to
 assemble new homes.
However
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, constructing it into a landscape could be profitable to earn budget and most of the nations want to live in a developed house in the
countryside
Use synonyms
. Because there are more homes available but they are not modern enough to feel comfortable.
For example
Linking Words
 when people have a desire to move to another side of their country to take breath from more clear air and to live in an environmental system. They will suffer from adopting the village's lifestyle since they live in a more innovative design life pattern.
Thus
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 constructors should build futuristic buildings in the
countryside
Use synonyms
 too. During the construction, employees will harm more green spaces than may we lose our farmyards
due to
Linking Words
 building.
For
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this
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 reason, people have to assume the
countryside
Use synonyms
's condition when they are required to live there. If they want to solve it by construction
instead
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 of living there they will miss natural products and green
places
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
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, we must avoid building new
places
Use synonyms
 into farmyards because it would be the main root of the deformation of these
places
Use synonyms
.
To conclude
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,
construction
Correct article usage
the construction
show examples
 of a village could be a good idea to do it, but saving these
places
Use synonyms
 is more vital than constructing it. In my
thought
Add a comma
thought,
show examples
that is
Linking Words
 better to retain the rural areas from injuries.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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Task Achievement
Work on presenting a more balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument in greater detail.
Coherence and Cohesion
Develop a clearer logical structure. The essay should have clear and distinct paragraphs with each paragraph discussing one main idea. Organize ideas systematically to ensure a logical flow.
Coherence and Cohesion
Proofread for grammar errors and awkward phrasings that may hinder readability.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the prompt.
Task Achievement
There is an attempt to discuss both the possible advantages and disadvantages of building homes in the countryside.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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