The percentage of persons arrested in 1994 and the most recent reasons for arrest.

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The pie chart shows the

percentages

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of people who were arrested in 1994,

while

Linking Words

the bar graph displays the most common

reason

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to be arrested in the same period studied. As a general trend, females were less arrested

in contrast

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male

Fix the agreement mistake

males

show examples

. In

addiion

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addition

,the public drinking

reason

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was the largest

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percentages

Fix the agreement mistake

percentage

show examples

while

Linking Words

theft was less

percetages

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percentage

percentages

compared to the other five

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reason

Change to a plural noun

reasons

show examples

Firsty

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Firstly

First

, only 9% of women were in

prision

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prison

whereas

Linking Words

32% of men were

arresten

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arrested

in 1994.

Secondly

Linking Words

, regarding the second

graph

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graph,

show examples

is seem

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seems

show examples

that there was a

significan

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significant

oscillation among

six

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the six

show examples

causes of detention. Public drinking showed the highest

percentages

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, reaching between 35% for women and 30% for males.

However

Linking Words

, the

thef

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thief

was the less common

reason

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, touching

percentages

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around 15

percent

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per cent

show examples

for both

gender

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genders

show examples

Finally

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, by 1999,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

men were more

detained

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detailed

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than women, whose

percentages

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were 91% less.

Moreover

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, the

thef

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thief

was the less common

frequently

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frequent

show examples

reason

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compare

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

to public drinking, where their proportion were around 35% and 20%, respectively.

camilo.venegas.bSat Jan 11 2025

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coherence cohesion

Strengthen the introduction by clearly stating the purpose of the essay and what the graphic data represents as a whole.

task achievement

Further elaborate on each point with supporting details from the data for a more comprehensive response.

coherence cohesion

Ensure logical consistency between sentences and paragraphs for improved clarity.

task achievement

Clarify the difference between the pie chart and the bar chart in terms of the data they present, either by specifying directly in your text or by providing clear examples.

task achievement

You successfully highlighted the key features of the charts provided, such as differences in arrest rates by gender and the main reasons for arrest.

coherence cohesion

You presented a basic structure for your essay with an introduction and conclusions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

165 words

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The percentage of persons arrested in 1994 and the most recent reasons for arrest.

Fully explain your ideas

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people say that to benefit the development of a child, the mother and father should take parenting classes. To what extent you agree or disagree with this statement?

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do u agree or disagree with this opinion?

It is inevitable that as technology develops, cultures must be lost. Technology and traditions are incompatible - you cannot have both together. To what extent do you agree or disagree?