Shops should not be allowed to sell any food and drinks that has been scientifically proved to be bad for people's health. To what extent do you agree or disagree
The scientist
has proven that some beverages Correct article usage
Scientist
has
been extremely lead Change the verb form
have
health
Change preposition
to health
problem
. I immensely agree
if the government whose pivotal role in almost every aspect of the nation's life, not limited to the culinary Fix the agreement mistake
problems
industry
, Use synonyms
forcely
Correct your spelling
forcibly
forbid
the seller Correct subject-verb agreement
forbids
retailing
their kind of unhealthy products. Change preposition
from retailing
This
essay will Linking Words
extent
the reason why I stand Replace the word
extend
for
.
As they have to comply Correct pronoun usage
for it
to
the law, they will think to find another way to produce Change preposition
with
the
healthier products. Correct article usage
apply
Otherwise
, their company will be suspended by the Council. Linking Words
Accordingly
, Linking Words
this
Linking Words
industry
will focus Use synonyms
to improve
its awareness Change preposition
on improving
in
Change preposition
of
population's
health, Correct article usage
the population's
such
as, by changing the Linking Words
frozen-ingredients
to Correct your spelling
ingredients
the
fresh Correct article usage
apply
one
. As Correct pronoun usage
ones
the
result, the number of healthy Correct article usage
a
Use synonyms
food
will increase Fix the agreement mistake
foods
while
Linking Words
on the other
Linking Words
hand
the unhealthy drinks will Add a comma
hand,
be
slightly plummet.
Unnecessary verb
apply
Additionally
, issuing Linking Words
the
certain policy to limit the culinary business Correct article usage
a
engaging
in Change preposition
from engaging
healthy
Replace the word
health
issue
is likely Fix the agreement mistake
issues
promote
healthy Add the particle
to promote
beverage
Fix the agreement mistake
beverages
become
more competitive in the market. Another rule that can be applied is not allowing the Fix the infinitive
to become
industry
to advertise Use synonyms
this
, Linking Words
may
lead Correct pronoun usage
which may
the
society Correct article usage
apply
do
not Unnecessary verb
apply
notice
the Fix the infinitive
to notice
food
as tastyUse synonyms
one
. As many people Correct pronoun usage
apply
Add a missing verb
are concern
concern
Replace the word
concerned
to
the Change preposition
about
trend
in their meal Fix the agreement mistake
trends
preference
, so no promotion possibly Fix the agreement mistake
preferences
create
the community to not Verb problem
cause
aware
Add a missing verb
be aware
about
Change preposition
of
this
product andLinking Words
will
possibly choose another meal.
Verb problem
apply
Eventhough
, between the parliament and the Correct your spelling
Even though
Use synonyms
industry
Add the comma(s)
industry,
has
set up to avoid unhealthy Correct subject-verb agreement
have
food
, it is important to create Use synonyms
awarness
individually. BecauseCorrect your spelling
awareness
,
the one who can control ourselves is each Remove the comma
apply
indivually
. We cannot rely only Correct your spelling
individually
with
Change the preposition
on
upon
other
to concern our Fix the agreement mistake
others
healthy
.
Replace the word
health
To sum up
, I agree if the Linking Words
authority
strictly regulate the producers not to sell Fix the agreement mistake
authorities
the
Correct article usage
apply
food
and drinks which can create Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
health's
Change noun form
health
problem
. I Fix the agreement mistake
problems
also
emphasize Linking Words
to
Change preposition
that
the
each person put Remove the article
apply
this
issue as their focus seriously.Linking Words
Submitted by arehnkiyaz on
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introduction conclusion
Ensure the introduction clearly outlines the topic and your position before diving into arguments.
logical structure
Enhance coherence by logically organizing ideas within paragraphs and using clear connectors.
supported main points
Provide more detailed explanations and examples to fully support your arguments.
task achievement
The essay attempts to provide a clear stance on the topic and supports it with reasons.
introduction conclusion
Sectioning into introduction, body, and conclusion is evident, which is good for structure.
task achievement
Makes a connection between government regulation and health, a relevant real-world scenario.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.