IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Interest in homeschooling is becoming more widespread around the world. In your opinion, should school be compulsory for all children, or should families be allowed the right to choose to educate their children at home? Support your opinion with reasons and examples from your own knowledge and experience.

#interest #world #school #children #families #right #home #support
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Interest in homeschooling is becoming more widespread around the world. In my opinion, I think should school be compulsory for all
children
Use synonyms
 . First of all , compulsory
education
Use synonyms
 can
ensurse
Correct your spelling
ensure
 that all young
children
Use synonyms
 can receive the same
education
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
 ,Chinese,English,
Mathemathics
Correct your spelling
Mathematics
 and other elective subjects, including Biology , geography etc.
This
Linking Words
 knowledge gained will be of some use to them in the
furture
Correct your spelling
future
.
In addition
Linking Words
, learning r school increases
children
Use synonyms
's communication skills .
Also
Linking Words
,
children
Use synonyms
 can learn how to get
along with
Linking Words
 each
others
Change to a singular noun
other
show examples
,
for
Linking Words
example
Add the comma(s)
example,
show examples
 group activities. It can
helps
Change the verb form
help
show examples
 them step out of society in the future.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, compulsory
education
Use synonyms
 can help some grassroots families to be able to provide an opportunity to learn, it is
beacuse
Correct your spelling
because
 their financial capacity cannot cope with the need to pay for places of study
such
Linking Words
 as extra tutor
class
Fix the agreement mistake
classes
show examples
.
Overall
Linking Words
, I believe that young
children
Use synonyms
 should receive compulsory
education
Use synonyms
 rather than allowing families the right to choose to homeschool their
children
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by asllchkied on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
To improve the essay, consider providing specific examples that illustrate your points. For instance, mention how certain countries or families effectively implement homeschooling or compulsory schooling.
task achievement
Ensure all main points are fully supported with examples or evidence to strengthen the argument.
overall improvement
Check for small grammatical and spelling errors, such as 'ensurse' which should be 'ensure,' to enhance clarity and professionalism.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear opinion from the start, setting the tone for the argument clearly.
coherence cohesion
Main points are logically structured and follow a coherent pattern, which makes the essay easy to read and understand.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the writer's opinion, reinforcing the stance taken in the introduction and body.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: