IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The plans below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#plans #show #harbour #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The map illustrates the information
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 a bridge in the year 2000 and nowadays.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen from the chart that Showers and toilets
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
disappear on
this
Linking Words
 day;
whereas
Linking Words
, two of the Fishing boats and Marina (private yachts) are relocated near them. In terms of location, there are plenty of arrangements with the Porth harbour and addition some places. At first glance, the Castle (disused) in the past have significantly renovated to be a Hotel and has Cafes & shops in the north-west, which is next to the Marina (private Yachs).
Moreover
Linking Words
, The east of the map shows the revolution of Dock, which is located next to the west of Public Beach. There are
increasing
Correct article usage
an increasing
show examples
 number of showers and toilets near the Marina(private yachts), which
relocate
Verb problem
are
show examples
attach
Wrong verb form
attached
show examples
 to the cafes and shops in the south of the chart nowadays. In the same period, two
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
parks
still
Add a missing verb
were still
show examples
 established on the east side of the Main road.
Submitted by benjawannsg on

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Task Response
The introduction provides a basic overview of the changes, but it could be enhanced with a clearer thesis statement to set the stage for the reader.
Task Response
The response generally covers main features of the maps, but it could be improved by specifying more details or examples, such as mentioning the exact changes or new structures added over time.
Coherence and Cohesion
Maintain a logical sequence in discussing the map elements to enhance coherence. For instance, you could start with changes related to infrastructure and then move on to the new additions.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve cohesion by using more linking words and phrases. Transition smoothly from one point to the next to create a more unified response.
Task Achievement
You accurately identified and compared the key changes in the harbour over the years.
Task Achievement
The essay pointed out main features related to Marina and public infrastructure changes, demonstrating a good understanding of the task.
Coherence and Cohesion
There is an overall attempt to create structure in your response, showing effort to logically organize the main ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • harbour (or harbor)
  • docks
  • shipping lanes
  • warehouses
  • recreational areas
  • infrastructure
  • additions
  • removals
  • facilities
  • environmental sustainability
  • economic impact
  • local community
  • capacity
  • technological advancements
  • industrial shipping
  • recreational use
  • surrounding infrastructure
What to do next:
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