IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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These days, some
people
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 hold the view that the most significant aim of
sicence
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science
sholud
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should
 be to make
people
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's live better and better.
This
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 topic is more and more popular and common all over the world. In my opinion, I agree with
this
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 topic, it is because the
development
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 of
science
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 can bring some benefits to
people
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's
lives
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. On the
one
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 hand,
science
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 can change
people
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's opinions and attitudes to their
lives
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. Through the developments of
science
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 and
technology
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,
people
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's
lives
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 have
a
Add a missing verb
had a
show examples
lot of changes than before.
For example
Linking Words
,
TilTok
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TikTok
 is
one
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 of the most important apps for us in daily life.
This
Linking Words
 app
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
people
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's
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
 more and more
colofuler
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colourful
. All kinds of websites can help
people
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 find
resoures
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resources
 to help them solve problems in work or study.
People
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 even can use these websites
buy
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to buy
show examples
 some products to
make sure
Verb problem
meet
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 their basic needs. Since the
development
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 of
science
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 and
technology
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,
people
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's
lives
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 become
more and more safe
Replace the words
safer and safer
safer
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,
comforetable
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comfortable
,
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and colorful
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colorful
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colourful
show examples
.
In addition
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, the progress of
science
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 can bring about the
development
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 of medical
technology
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,
thus
Linking Words
 improving
people
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's health. As
Add a comma
fas,
show examples
fas
Correct your spelling
far
show examples
 as we all know, keeping
health
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healthy
show examples
 is
one
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 of the most important parts
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 daily life. Since
sicence
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science
 developed, when
people
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 fall ill, they go to
hospital
Add an article
the hospital
show examples
 to ask for help, doctors can use medical equipment to find the problem,
meanwhile
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meanwhile,
show examples
 they can
also
Linking Words
 give
people
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 some medication to help
people
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 get better. In conclusion,
people
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 should encourage the
development
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 of
science
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 and
technology
Use synonyms
. It is because
science
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 is
one
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 of the most important parts
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 daily life,
people
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's
lives
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 can not live without it. If
science
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will develop
Wrong verb form
develops
show examples
 better,
people
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 will have a
butter
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better
show examples
 and happier
futuer
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future
.

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grammar
Ensure proper spelling and grammar to enhance clarity and professionalism in your writing.
content
Expand on your ideas with further examples or explanations to make your arguments more robust.
cohesion
Improve the flow of your essay by using more varied linking words to connect your ideas smoothly.
content
You have a clear opinion that aligns well with the topic, indicating your stance on the importance of science in improving lives.
example
You offered a relevant example concerning technology (TikTok) to support your points about the impact of science on daily life.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
What to do next:
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