In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
There are many relocations from the outskirt populations, moving into the
cities
, resulting Use synonyms
as
less population around Change preposition
in
Correct article usage
the coutryside
coutryside
. Many people believe that it is an effective development for their Correct your spelling
countryside
cities
, Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
other
may argue that it is a drawback for general society. Fix the agreement mistake
others
This
essay believes that Linking Words
the
moving Correct article usage
apply
lead
to negative aspects because it Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
is rising
many obstacles for Wrong verb form
raises
individual
who Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
dicide
to move into the Correct your spelling
decide
cities
.
Moving into the city, which consists Use synonyms
many
businesses and services, enhances the greater opportunities for Change preposition
of many
persuing
Correct your spelling
pursuing
the
jobs for Correct article usage
apply
individual
than Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
lives
in Correct subject-verb agreement
live
the
under-developed Correct article usage
apply
area
. Fix the agreement mistake
areas
For instance
, there are many restaurants, which Linking Words
alway
Correct your spelling
always
requie
working staff, on every corner of the street. They could grow their wealth during Correct your spelling
require
working
period. Add an article
the working
On the other hand
, they have to face many challenges, Linking Words
such
asLinking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
cost
of living, which is higher than Correct article usage
the cost
rural
Change preposition
in rural
area
, and the lively city inevitably Fix the agreement mistake
areas
connect
with Correct subject-verb agreement
connects
stressful
environment.
People who Add an article
a stressful
relocates
Change the verb form
relocate
into
the Change preposition
to
cities
Use synonyms
has
to abandon their land, facing Change the verb form
have
with
Change preposition
apply
the
loneliness. They have to leave their family, friends, and pets, at their former place, and Correct article usage
apply
this
reason increases Linking Words
the
mental health issues for them. Change the word
their
Moreover
, numerous Linking Words
lifes
in the Correct your spelling
lives
cities
are causing serious pollution. Use synonyms
For instance
, the Linking Words
congestions
from traffic, which is from Fix the agreement mistake
congestion
the
personal car usage, and the air pollution from their Correct article usage
apply
car's
Change noun form
car
emission
.
In conclusion, Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
while
moving into the Linking Words
cities
creates many chances for personal asset development, there are many critical Use synonyms
problem
hiding behind the beautiful angles. The negative reasons Change to a plural noun
problems
are
totally Unnecessary verb
apply
outweigth
the positive.Correct your spelling
outweigh
outweighs
Submitted by rutkittiphot on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Ensure that your essay addresses all parts of the question clearly and completely. Discuss both positive and negative aspects more evenly to provide a balanced view.
coherence cohesion
Be consistent with your structure: Start with an introduction that outlines your main points, followed by cohesive paragraphs that expand on these points, and conclude with a strong and clear summary.
coherence cohesion
Use paragraphs effectively to organize different ideas or arguments. Each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence and follow logically from the one before.
task achievement
The essay successfully identifies key arguments for why moving to cities can be negative, showing an understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame the argument.
coherence cohesion
Efforts to include examples, such as job opportunities and pollution, indicate an attempt to connect ideas with real-world scenarios.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?