IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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This
Linking Words
 line chart illustrates
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the
eprcentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
if
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
 the
poplulation
Correct your spelling
population
 in four Asian cities
Correct word choice
and countires
show examples
countires
Correct your spelling
countries
 living between 1970 and 2000. meanwhile. it
also
Linking Words
predict
Change the verb form
predicts
show examples
 the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
from
Change preposition
between
show examples
 2030 and 2040. About the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 in Malaysia, it was 30% in 1970,
then
Linking Words
 it increased slowly to 45% in 1990. The
percentage
Use synonyms
 was growth up fast between 1990 and 2020, it was about 78% in 2020,
then
Linking Words
 it will
also
Linking Words
 keep increasing to 98% in 2010.
About the
Change preposition
The
show examples
percenteage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of
Use synonyms
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 in
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
, it was about 30% in1970 and 1970.
Then
Linking Words
 the
percentage
Use synonyms
 was first increased and
then
Linking Words
 declined
berween
Correct your spelling
between
 1980 and 2010, and the
percentage
Use synonyms
 was 39% in 2010.
Afert
Correct your spelling
After
 that, the
percentage
Use synonyms
increase
Replace the word
increased
show examples
 to 50% year by year. About the
percenteage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of
Use synonyms
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 in Thailand, it was about 19% in 1970, it rose to 30% in 1990.
Linking Words
Then
Correct your spelling
The
show examples
percentage
Use synonyms
 was about 32%
from
Change preposition
between
show examples
 1990 and 2020. It will
be growth
Verb problem
grow
show examples
 to 50% in 2040.
About
Change preposition
As
show examples
 the
percenteage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of
Use synonyms
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 in Indonesia, the
percentage
Use synonyms
 was 11% at the beginning
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 1970,
then
Linking Words
 it will stay rising to 60% in 2040. In conclusion,
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
the
percentage
Use synonyms
 in these four cities increased between 1970 and 2020, they will keep
grow
Change the verb form
growing
show examples
 in the future. The
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 increased fastest in Malaysia and Indonesia.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, population with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 10 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 8 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • graph
  • percentage
  • population
  • cities
  • Asian countries
  • 1970
  • 2020
  • predictions
  • 2030
  • 2040
  • estimations
  • urban
  • increasing
  • steadily
  • Japan
  • China
  • rise
  • urbanization
  • South Korea
  • India
  • upward trend
  • slow pace
  • surpass
  • resided
  • projected
  • moderate increase
  • significant surge
  • exceed
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