IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Today more and more tourist are visiting places where conditions are difficult such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctica. What are the advantages and disadvantages for tourist who visit such places.

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Nowadays,many individuals are interested
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 visiting dangerous
places
Use synonyms
 in
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
show examples
 of seeking for
advanturs
Correct your spelling
adventures
adventure
adventurous
 and
increase
Wrong verb form
increasing
show examples
 dopamine levels.
Although
Linking Words
 exploring
a new
Correct the article-noun agreement
new places
a new place
show examples
places
Use synonyms
 with difficult conditions could be
significantely
Correct your spelling
significantly
 important and
funny
Correct word choice
fun
show examples
,the
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
 overtake the pros many times. On the one hand , visiting dangerous
places
Use synonyms
 of the world become
hobby
Add an article
a hobby
show examples
 for many
advanturers
Correct your spelling
adventurers
 who seeking
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
excitiations
Correct your spelling
excitations
excitation
 and new experiences .
Furthermore
Linking Words
 ,the primary way helped in
exploreing
Correct your spelling
exploring
 nowadays
world
Change the noun form
worlds
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
people
Change preposition
for people
show examples
 and institutions have the courage and the desire .
In addition
Linking Words
 , a huge number of these
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
explored
Add a missing verb
were explored
show examples
 for the first time by
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
show examples
For instance
Linking Words
 , Petra, Jordan which
discovered
Add a missing verb
was discovered
show examples
 in the 19th century by
Correct article usage
a swiss
show examples
swiss
Capitalize word
Swiss
show examples
 explorer .
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
advanture
Correct your spelling
advantages
 to
places
Use synonyms
 with
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
difficalt
Correct your spelling
difficult
 conditions may lead to undesirable consequences since
majority
Add an article
the majority
a majority
show examples
 of these areas carry various types of animals and
creature
Fix the agreement mistake
creatures
show examples
that could be harmful
in addition
Linking Words
 to unknown areas that may not be on the map .
For example
Linking Words
 , many adventurers lost their lives
while
Linking Words
 exploring or taking dangerous challenges and
become
Wrong verb form
became
show examples
 part
pf
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
story
Correct article usage
the story
show examples
 of
risk - taking
Correct your spelling
risk-taking
show examples
,George
mallory
Change the capitalization
Mallory
show examples
 disappeared during his
exploring
Replace the word
exploration
show examples
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 Everest
mount
Capitalize word
Mount
show examples
. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 exploring areas with
difficalt
Correct your spelling
different
 conditions
by
Change preposition
through
show examples
 tourism will bring
sense
Add an article
a sense
show examples
 of satisfaction and challenge ,it could be followed
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
consequances
Correct your spelling
consequences
will
Correct pronoun usage
that will
show examples
effects
Verb problem
affect
show examples
 their lives forever .

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Coherence and Cohesion
Improve the logical flow of ideas by organizing them into clear paragraphs with topic sentences. This will help guide the reader through your essay more effectively.
Task Achievement
Focus on ensuring that each main point is fully extended and well-supported with detailed examples and explanations.
Language Use
Pay attention to spelling and grammar issues to enhance clarity and professionalism.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively setting up and summarizing the discussion.
Task Achievement
The response addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the topic, showing an understanding of the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • adventurous
  • extreme
  • inhospitable
  • unpredictable
  • exotic
  • rare
  • challenging
  • thrilling
  • appreciation
  • cultural immersion
  • physical endurance
  • mental strength
  • dangerous
  • accidents
  • limited amenities
  • high cost
  • environmental impact
What to do next:
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