Some people believe that parents should limit their children hours of watching tv and playing computer games, but encourage to read books. Do you agree or disagree

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Some individuals argue that parents should look after their children and what activities they do in their daily routine. They believe that

childrens

Correct your spelling

children

show examples

should be more encouraged towards reading books

Change preposition

apply

show examples

paying

Correct your spelling

playing

show examples

games or watching TV. I partially agree with

this

Linking Words

persepective

Correct your spelling

perspective

beacuse

Correct your spelling

because

both things are equally important for children. First and

formost

Correct your spelling

foremost

relaxtion

Correct your spelling

relaxation

is extremely

significant

Correct word choice

important

show examples

for everyone, children need some time

relax

Fix the infinitive

to relax

show examples

their

mind

Fix the agreement mistake

minds

show examples

and

continous

Correct your spelling

continuous

hours of

stuies

Correct your spelling

studies

schools

Fix the agreement mistake

school

show examples

. They barely receive spare time for themselves after attending schools and

tutions

Correct your spelling

tuitions

singhjasneet11Wed Feb 05 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

Expand on your introduction by clearly stating your position and why you partially agree. This will help in clearly communicating your argument to the reader.

Task Achievement

Ensure that the main ideas are fully developed. For instance, explain why relaxation is necessary in more detail and how it impacts children’s overall well-being.

Coherence and Cohesion

Use linking words and phrases to enhance the flow of your essay and connect your ideas more effectively.

General Writing

Double-check for grammatical errors (e.g., 'childrens' should be 'children' and 'beacuse' should be 'because'). Proofreading will help you present a clearer message.

Content

You have presented a balanced view by recognizing the importance of both reading and relaxation.

Structure

Your essay begins to address the topic effectively, establishing a pragmatic approach to the issue.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

1
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

2 paragraphs

85 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Many people think that regions affect a successful person. What is your opinion about the native region and accomplished person’s influence on the region he belongs to?
The intricate interplay between an accomplished individual and their native region constitutes a dynamic relationship of profound significance. Undoubtedly, one's upbringing within a specific locale imbues them with distinct values, perspectives, and opportunities, sculpting their trajectory towards success. Varied factors such as the caliber of educational infrastructure, economic prospects, cultural ethos, and communal support networks diverge significantly across regions, exerting a pivotal influence on an individual's journey to achievement.
6.5
band
Many people lose their income due to CoVid19 pandemic. What solution that can do by government or individual to overcome this problem.
It is a great issue that a group of individuals has been facing stiff challenges because of COVID-19 pandemic across the globe. This pandemic not only affects human health but also decreases the level of earnings at an alarming rate. In this essay, I will discuss some measures which will be taken either by the government or person to address this issue.
6
band
Some people think it is better for children to being to learn a foreign language at primary school than at secondary school. What’s your opinion? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
Some people think it is better for children to being to learn a foreign language at primary school than at secondary school. What’s your opinion? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
6.5
band
In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?
In some nations, there are many people attracted to find out about the history of the building where they live. I really agree with this argument because this trend leads to positive impacts for homeowners to know about the capacity and safety of the house from professional analysis.
7
band
In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
In this day and age, transport is always a hotly debated topic. In some countries, some individuals argue that spending a huge amount of money on building a new railway for very fast trains between cities is vital. Others oppose and believe that we should invest in improving existing public transport. The following essay will discuss both views.

Some people believe that parents should limit their children hours of watching tv and playing computer games, but encourage to read books. Do you agree or disagree

Include an introduction and conclusion

Many people think that regions affect a successful person. What is your opinion about the native region and accomplished person’s influence on the region he belongs to?

Many people lose their income due to CoVid19 pandemic. What solution that can do by government or individual to overcome this problem.

Some people think it is better for children to being to learn a foreign language at primary school than at secondary school. What’s your opinion? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion