IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevent.

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevent.
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The line chart below illustrates the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in the
USA
Use synonyms
,
Sweden
Use synonyms
 and Japan.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the graph that in 1940, Japan was the lowest country with people aged
higher
Correct word choice
more
show examples
 than 65.
While
Linking Words
 in the same home in 2040, it was the top in the statistics. The percentage in 1940 was 5%,
whereas
Linking Words
 at the peak was more than 25%.
In
Change preposition
From
show examples
 1960 until 2020, there was a decline before the
rising
Replace the word
rise
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, In the
USA
Use synonyms
 and
Sweden
Use synonyms
, the lines
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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fluctuated from 1980 to 2020. At the
begin
Replace the word
beginning
show examples
 of 1940,
Sweden
Use synonyms
 was less than
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
, It was over 5% and in the
USA
Use synonyms
is
Verb problem
it was
show examples
 almost 10%. It witnessed an
exeeding
Correct your spelling
exceeding
 for
Sweden
Use synonyms
2040
Change preposition
in 2040
show examples
.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words usa, sweden with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "proportion" in your introduction.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • demographics
  • population aged 65 and over
  • time span
  • initial data points
  • proportions
  • steady increase
  • stagnation
  • decline
  • sharp increase/decrease
  • trends over time
  • fastest growth
  • least change
  • projection
  • predicted proportions
  • societal impacts
  • aging population
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