IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

A good friend has just changed schools and is having difficulty fitting in and needs your advice. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter • make suggestions as to how they could make friends • suggest joining clubs, participating in school activities • give any extra general advice You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear...,

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Dear Sara, I'm so sorry to hear that you have difficulties adapting to your new school, though you shouldn't be worried as it's completely normal.
Obviosly
Correct your spelling
Obviously
, there are various ways that you can
find
Verb problem
make
show examples
 new friends. Why don't you try to be closer to your
roomamtes
Correct your spelling
roommates
?Just be confident and start conversations with everyone in your dormitory. You can
also
Linking Words
 download some
applicastions
Correct your spelling
applications
 like Tinder or Melon so as to find
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people with the same interests as you, and arrange a meeting with them.
In addition
Linking Words
, I think you should join a sports club, where you can exercise
as well as
Linking Words
socializing
Wrong verb form
socialise
show examples
 with new people.As I can remember, you've been always interested in football, perhaps you should join a team there. I'm sure you'll get used to your new life and expand your friends soon, so try to stay positive. I believe
evrything
Correct your spelling
everything
 will be okay. I'm eagerly looking forward to hearing from you soon. Take care, Nil

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task response
Try to include a more detailed introduction that acknowledges the situation your friend is in. This will create a stronger connection and show empathy.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use clearer transitions between ideas to enhance the flow of your writing. This will help the reader follow your thoughts more easily.
coherence and cohesion
Check for spelling errors and typos (like 'roommates' and 'applications') to improve the overall clarity of your letter.
tone
Your letter has a friendly and supportive tone, which is great for communicating with a friend.
task response
You provided practical suggestions for making friends and joining clubs, which is very relevant to your friend's situation.
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