IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. whhy might this be the case? what could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

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Working has always been an essential part
for
Change preposition
of
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 every
adults'
Change noun form
adult's
show examples
 life. In recent times, many people started to consider working by themselves
instead
Linking Words
 of joining an enterprise, hoping to have more flexibility and leisure
time
Use synonyms
. Despite
this
Linking Words
, there are several points to be noted by all employees before deciding to start their own business. The shifting of employees from their corporate
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
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 to become self-employed
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 caused by several
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
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, mainly
due to
Linking Words
 the unhealthy company's culture and the comfort of managing their
time
Use synonyms
. Many
company
Change to a plural noun
companies
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 have a fixed duration of working hours, typically nine-to-five and sometimes longer.
For example
Linking Words
, during high season when the employees are overloaded with tasks, they will be required to overtime leaving them feeling drained.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the self-employed style of working
provide
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provides
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 flexibility
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 working
time
Use synonyms
 and
in
Change preposition
apply
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doing tasks at their own pace, which
benefit
Correct subject-verb agreement
benefits
show examples
 them. Even though being an entrepreneur has several merits, there are several drawbacks to be understood. Many
entrepreneur
Change to a plural noun
entrepreneurs
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 have unstable income
due to
Linking Words
 fluctuations of clients that prefer to collaborate with a well-known company than a start-up.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
wide
Add an article
a wide
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 range of roles
such
Linking Words
 as marketer, admin,
designer
Correct word choice
and designer
show examples
 which are
time
Use synonyms
-consuming jobs will
also
Linking Words
 be performed by themselves.
This
Linking Words
 can lead to stress and a decrease in physical health. To summarize, the general public
choose
Change the verb form
chooses
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 to be self-employed because they can manage their own working
time
Use synonyms
.
As a result
Linking Words
, many positions which are usually performed by different people
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 to be handled by them, requiring more
time
Use synonyms
 to finish the tasks.

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task achievement
Try to ensure your introduction clearly outlines the main points you will discuss in the essay. This sets the reader's expectations and provides a clear roadmap for your argument.
task achievement
It would be beneficial to provide more specific examples or details to back up your points. This can strengthen your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to maintain parallel structure within your sentences, especially when listing items. This will enhance clarity and readability.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that each idea flows logically into the next. Using cohesive devices effectively will help with this, transitioning smoothly between ideas.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the prompt and discusses both the reasons for choosing self-employment and its disadvantages, which is a key requirement of the task.
task achievement
You have conveyed a generally clear understanding of the topic and have presented a balanced view of self-employment, acknowledging both the pros and cons.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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