Some people believe that men and women are equal and so women should be able to do any job they want. Others feel that men and women are not equal and therefore there are certain jobs are not suitable for women. What is your opinion ?

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While
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some people believe that both genders are equal and
women
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are able to do any job, others hold a view that they are not comparable
and
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apply
show examples
so there might
some
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be some
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inconvenience for
women
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in certain job
fields
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. I firmly agree with the statement that
women
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should avoid
from
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apply
show examples
certain work
areas
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that might require more responsibility than they can cope with. Since there are not only physical difficulties but
also
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mental challenges
in particular
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work spaces,
i
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I
show examples
believe that
women
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should take these into their
considerations
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consideration
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. First and foremost, there are several specialities
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in that
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that
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which
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we might experience gender diversity
such
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as healthcare, education,
journalism
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and journalism
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to name just a few.
While
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some certain
areas
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are
women
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-dominated
fields
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namely education, there are too many
fields
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mostly male-dominated like IT and technology. It is obvious that some
areas
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such
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as engineering, agriculture,military and construction sites tend to be predominantly male. Considering that
,
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apply
show examples
these
fields
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burden
women
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with more duties than they can manage and so these
fields
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are not common
preference
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preferences
show examples
between them.
However
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,
women
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shows
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show
show examples
more patience and empathy than men and so these
phsycological
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psychological
physiological
features contributed to certain
fields
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.
For example
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,
women
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are more interested in child development not only nurturing but
also
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teaching them.
Additionally
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,
women
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face physical challenges in strength-intensive jobs
such
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as manual
labor
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labour
show examples
which
that
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apply
show examples
they have to lift heavy materials or
operating
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operate
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heavy machinery.
Beside
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Besides
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that, space exploration is another field that
challenging
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is challenging
show examples
beceause
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because
of intense G-force exposure and long-duration isolation from your family and relatives which have impacts on
both
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you both
show examples
mentally and physically. Many
women
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experience verbal abuse from their male
collegues
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colleagues
and
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apply
show examples
so
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which
show examples
affecting
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affects
show examples
their mental well-being.
In addition
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, the dual burden of professional and domestic responsibilities might lead to burnout.
For instance
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, a female doctor working long shifts may struggle with expectations to
also
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manage household duties. In conclusion,
while
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women
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have several advantages in certain
areas
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such
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as teaching and child development ,they
also
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might face
obtacles
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obstacles
in particular
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areas
Use synonyms
because of physical and mental differences between genders.

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Task Achievement
Focus on providing a balanced argument by including perspectives that support women's ability to work in any field they choose. This will strengthen your task response and demonstrate a more comprehensive understanding of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Refine the structure of your paragraphs to ensure that each one contains a clear topic sentence that aligns with your main argument. This will enhance the logical flow of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on grammatical accuracy and ensure that all sentences are structured clearly. For instance, in sentences like 'However, women shows more patience and empathy than men', the verb should be 'show'.
Task Achievement
You have clearly identified your opinion and main arguments, demonstrating critical thinking about gender roles in the workplace.
Task Achievement
You included relevant examples, which adds depth to your arguments and engages the reader.
Coherence and Cohesion
The inclusion of various sectors where gender disparities exist shows a good understanding of the topic's complexity.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender equality
  • workforce
  • diversity
  • business outcomes
  • female leaders
  • perceptions
  • gender roles
  • societal norms
  • stereotypes
  • human potential
  • job suitability
  • physical attributes
  • skills
  • qualifications
  • passion
  • male-dominated fields
  • engineering
  • military
  • leadership roles
  • breaking down stereotypes
  • encouraging diversity
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