IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

You recently made a journy by train. When you got on the train, you realiesd you had left a bag on the platform. Right a letter to the station manager . In your letter: give details of where and when you left the bag. describe the bag and its content suggest how you get the bag back

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Dear Sir or Madam, I would like to request
you
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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that I
left
Wrong verb form
leave
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 my luggage at the station when I
got
Wrong verb form
get
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 on the
train
Use synonyms
.I remembered
while
Linking Words
 the
train
Use synonyms
 was running.
Firstly
Linking Words
,I was
waiting
Add the preposition
waiting for
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 the
train
Use synonyms
 at the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
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train
Use synonyms
station's
Change noun form
station
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  rest meanwhile,there
are
Wrong verb form
were
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 too
much
Change the quantifier
many
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 passengers over there and I
was look
Change the verb form
was looking
was looked
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 after my bags suddenly,
Use synonyms
train
Add an article
the train
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has come
Wrong verb form
came
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 and I tried to get the
train
Use synonyms
 quickly
due to
Linking Words
 togetherness.I
forgot
Verb problem
left
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 my bag at the platform .
Secondly
Linking Words
,the colour is black of
my
Change the word
the
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 suitcase and medium size
as well as
Linking Words
its
Correct your spelling
it is
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 important for me because my all
essentials
Fix the agreement mistake
essential
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 documents in
this
Linking Words
 if I
lost
Wrong verb form
lose
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 my bag.It will be hard for me.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,if you would have had my bag,it
will
Wrong verb form
would
show examples
 be
great
Correct article usage
a great
show examples
houner
Correct your spelling
honour
 for me.I will collect
this
Linking Words
 tomorrow from your office because I have to come back to collect
this
Linking Words
. Thank you for your
coperation
Correct your spelling
cooperation
 and consideration. Yours faithfully, Rabia.

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coherence
Ensure that your ideas are organized logically. You could benefit from clearer paragraphing to separate different thoughts more distinctly.
task response
Try to elaborate a bit more on your points, particularly about how important the bag is to you. This could strengthen your response.
task achievement
Your tone is polite and respectful, which is appropriate for a letter of this nature.
task achievement
You've included details about the bag and when you left it, addressing the task requirements.

Structure your letter

A letter needs to be written using a proper format, including the following:

  • A greeting (Dear sir/madam, Dear John, Dear Mr. Smith)
  • The main body (consisting of paragraphs for each part of the letter)
  • A closing (Yours sincerely, Yours faithfully, Best wishes, Kind regards, Love)

When writing a letter as part of the IELTS General Training Writing Task 1, it is important to include the bullet points presented to you in the question.

All three bullet points need to be presented. And remember that some bullet points contain more than one element. So, make sure to watch for ‘and’ and plurals.

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