Some say cultural traditions are destroyed when they are used as money-making attractions for tourists. Others say this is the only way to save such traditions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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People
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have been co-existing for the longest time together and during
this
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period the only thing that sets us all apart is each of our cultures.
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, as time went by and technology started to get more in
people
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's lives, many had forgotten their obligation and devotion toward cultural
tradition
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, some
people
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even took it to the next level by making a living out of those unique cultural practices.
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leads to a heated argument about whether the practice of using cultural traditions as
tourist
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attractions might end up as the act of destroying
one
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culture
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, or the only way that will
remembered
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be remembered
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,
this
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essay will discuss
this
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issue in the following paragraph. First of all,
people
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are the cruelest when it comes to money-related topics. So, the concern of whether they will destroy the cultural
tradition
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in exchange for money-making attractions for tourists is very reasonable. As we know tourists tend to be more curious when they come to discover new things in new places,
this
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might be a very easy topic for some
people
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who might use
this
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opportunity to sell fake products that are related to
one
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specific
culture
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in the area.
Moreover
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, some cultural
tradition
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sites
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are ancient historical temples, which means they will be easier to destroy as the number of visitors keeps on rising without proper instruction. Take Angkor Wat as an example, the number of
a
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apply
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tourist
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guides
that
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is
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are
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willing to go overboard just for a little more site money is rising, which results in
the
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apply
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more damage that was done to the ancient temple.
Thus
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, the usage of the cultural
tradition
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as a
tourist
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attraction really had bad effects on those
sites
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.
However
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, some cases are different. As we all know everything will be forgotten if being left alone for so long.
This
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also
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works the same as those cultural
tradition
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sites
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. Some cultural
practice
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practices
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are not harmed by doing it regularly. The Khmer Apsara dance is a very good example of the usage of cultural practice as both a
tourist
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attraction and to keep the
culture
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remembered. Another case is that cultural
sites
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can help with education purposes. So, by making money out of every visit to those ancient
sites
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, on the bright side, it
also
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helps those who visited to remember and know what had happened in the past time.
To sum up
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, everything has good and bad side effects,
such
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as the usage of cultural
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tradition
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traditions
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for money-making, as long as
people
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keep in without
the
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a
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set limit everything can be profited and remembered. In conclusion, the heritage of
one
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culture
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should be
use
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used
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as
the
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a
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tourist
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attraction for
one
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culture
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culture's
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own good but
also
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make sure that the
demage
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damage
are
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is
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under
controll
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control
and no more off
limit
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limited
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treatment for any money-making contribution.

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task achievement
Consider providing a clearer thesis statement in your introduction that more explicitly outlines your position.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence to improve the logical flow of your ideas.
task achievement
Try to use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas and make them more precise.
task achievement
You offered relevant examples to illustrate both sides of the argument, which helps to support your points.
task achievement
You effectively explained the impact of tourism on cultural traditions, which shows an understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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