IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You work at home and have a problem with a piece of equipment that you use for your job. Write a letter to the shop or company which supplied the equipment. In your letter ●describe the problem with the equipment ●explain how this problem is affecting your work ●say what you want the shop or company to do

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to express my dissatisfaction with your company
laptop
Use synonyms
. I
am
Wrong verb form
have been
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 a regular and loyal customer of your shop since 2020. I have been purchasing electrical
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
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 from your shop for the past 5 years. Recently, I bought
the
Correct article usage
a
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 Dell
laptop
Use synonyms
 for my work
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
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. It was operating well till
last
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 week and after
that
Add a comma
that,
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 I faced some display issues and connectivity problems with the internet. So, I tried to update
software
Correct article usage
the software
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 but the problem
is persisting
Wrong verb form
persists
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.
Moreover
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, I have been facing software glitches
in
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apply
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every 5 hours after continuous usage.
As a result
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, my work is greatly affected. After great struggles, I was appointed
in
Change preposition
to
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this
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 job and
Use synonyms
laptop
Correct article usage
a laptop
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 is mandatory to carry out. I am working with international clients so I need to communicate with them through video calls. Disruption in connectivity has caused
significant
Add an article
a significant
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 negative impact
in
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on
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 my work. I kindly request you to replace the
laptop
Use synonyms
 with
new
Correct article usage
a new
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 one. I tried to contact the technicians
for sorting
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to sort
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the
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out the
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 issues but nobody responded. So, replacement is the only option for me. I am looking forward to your prompt response in
this
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 matter. Yours faithfully, Santhoshkumar

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coherence cohesion
Consider varying your vocabulary and sentence structures to enhance the overall quality of your writing.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to clearly separate your ideas into distinct paragraphs to improve readability.
task achievement
When discussing the impact of the problem, include specific examples to illustrate the challenges you face at work.
task achievement
Ensure your tone remains professional throughout while still being polite and assertive.
task achievement
You maintained a polite and formal tone throughout the letter, which is appropriate for this type of correspondence.
task achievement
You provided a clear description of the problem and its impact on your work, which is essential for the reader's understanding.
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