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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the mainfeatures, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the mainfeatures, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The data depicts the ten nations which are the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
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most expensive for petrol in the world.
Overall
Linking Words
, the wealthiest nations
such
Linking Words
 as
Norway
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, Holland, Denmark, Britain, Sweden and Belgium spend a small portion of their average incomes on petrol whilst the others dedicate an important percentage. Looking in closer detail at the table, it can be observable that Turkey and Eritrea feature the lowest average revenues, accounting for 924.4 $ and 450.09$,respectively.
However
Linking Words
, their dedicated budget to acquire oil makes up an important part of their global income, representing 34.20% for Turkey and 61.10% for Eritrea.Italy and Greece seem to be an intermediate group, as they showcase 1832.15$ and 1112.02£, which make up 15.50% and 25.40%, respectively As
regard
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regards
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to
Change preposition
apply
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the other figures, it is noticeable that
Norway
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, Holland, Denmark, Britain, Sweden and Belgium feature a huge average monthly income and put an amount that may be equal
or
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to or
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 less than 10% ,on fossil fuels.
Norway
Use synonyms
for instance
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,is
semmingly
Correct your spelling
seemingly
 the most affluent state, with an average revenue of 4319.07£, but expend only 7.40% on petrol.
However
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, it is striking that the percentage isn't representative of the amount put on the table. Turkey,
for instance
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,
spend
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spends
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 monthly 315.96$, which represents 34.20%,
whereas
Linking Words
Norway
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spend
Change the verb form
spends
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 a close amount of 319.85$, which
esquals
Correct your spelling
equals
 7.40% of the average income.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "for instance, however".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words norway with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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