IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Caring for children is probably the most important job in any society. Because of this, all mothers and fathers should be required to take a course that prepares them to be good parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

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Certainly, baby care is a tremendous responsibility. Some people argue whether it is necessary to get ready to be a parent by attending additional courses. Personally, I believe it is essential and the government should provide support in
this
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 matter.
To begin
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 with, it is significant that the first child would not be harmed. The lack of knowledge may be the cause of incidents
such
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 as
,
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apply
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 choking babies, infections and many more. If adults did not obtain a relevant course, they would not know how to react.
Consequently
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, the child may experience many mental traumas and physical injuries. In my opinion, no human being deserves
this
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. We should train care ahead rather than on the newborn.
Moreover
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, we should use the access to the modern knowledge. Because
many
Correct quantifier usage
much
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 new
researches
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research
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have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 been made, paternity courses are getting better and better.
For instance
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, nowadays, we know that milk produced in the evening contains melatonin hormone. Some believe it may make babies more sleepy after drinking.
While
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 it can be true, I opt for asking professionals during
trainings
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training
pieces of training
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 and classes to be sure that the practices we are using not only are working but
also
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 are beneficial for babies. Being aware that not everyone can afford
this
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, I think it is the government's task to provide enough support so that people can join
such
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 a course.
To conclude
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, it is a contentious issue whether parents need to complete the teaching before raising the family. I concur it should be provided by public institutions because it is so essential for infants' well-being.

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coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea related to the overall thesis. This will improve the logical flow of your essay.
task achievement
Expand on some of your points with additional examples or explanations to make your arguments more persuasive.
coherence and cohesion
Check for minor grammatical errors or awkward phrasing to enhance clarity and readability.
task achievement
You clearly state your opinion and provide a structured response to the prompt, which is essential for a good score.
task achievement
You include relevant examples that support your arguments, showing a reasonable understanding of the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Parenting skills
  • Child development
  • Mandatory courses
  • Nutrition
  • Discipline strategies
  • Effective communication
  • Government regulations
  • Voluntary workshops
  • Community support
  • Cultural backgrounds
  • Personal beliefs
  • Emotionally stable
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