IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In many places, large chain stores are taking over the marketplace, making it impossible for small businesses to compete with them What are the advantages and disadvantages of this situation? Support your opinion with reasons and examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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In many places ,
businessmans
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businessmen
businessman
 try to finish all small
competitores
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competitors
 in the market. large showroom owners try to
takeover
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take over
show examples
 all industries
nd
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and
show examples
 want to make big profits.
According to
Linking Words
 me, we have many
demarits
Correct your spelling
demerits
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
this
Linking Words
 situation.
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will
explains
Change the verb form
explain
show examples
inside
Change preposition
in
show examples
 my paragraph below-
Business-owners
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Business owners
show examples
 try to
takeover
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take over
show examples
 all small
industiries
Correct your spelling
industries
, they want to finish
this
Linking Words
 small corporation from the market. After finishing everything they will sell their products as they want and at their own prices.
People
Use synonyms
 have to depend on big stores and have to spend more money. In case of
emergency
Add a comma
emergency,
show examples
 these stores are helpful. They are working late-night and
people
Use synonyms
 can bring anything from
their
Replace the word
there
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, In
canada
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Canada
show examples
 in showrooms or supercenters, they try to push all
people
Use synonyms
 to buy products from supercenters even
they
Correct word choice
if they
show examples
 do not have fresh vegetables
nd
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and
show examples
 fruits. From the small store like small marches they bring limited stuff and
another days
Replace the adjective
another day
other days
show examples
 they change everything for better quality.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Inside
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 single
roof
Add a comma
roof,
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 we can get everything, it may save customer's
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
 and we don't need to go store-by-store
for buying
Change preposition
to buy
show examples
 things. It will be good if
customer
Fix the agreement mistake
customers
show examples
 buy products in bulk and they will provide some discounts.
For instance
Linking Words
, on
christmas
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Christmas
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 love to buy stuff in bulk as they
gift
Correct subject-verb agreement
gifts
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 to relatives
nd
Correct your spelling
and
show examples
 friends,
supercenters
Correct word choice
and supercenters
show examples
 provide discounts. They have to pay less amount
usally
Correct your spelling
usually
 they paid. In
cluclusion
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conclusion
, both sides have advantages
nd
Correct your spelling
and
show examples
 disadvantages but
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 agree that big consumers want
takeover
Correct your spelling
take over
show examples
 small
bussiness-owners
Correct your spelling
business owners
 to enhance their growth in
market
Add an article
the market
show examples
.

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task achievement
Make sure to revise your introduction and conclusion for clarity and completeness. Clearly state your main arguments and summarize them effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Focus on maintaining a logical flow in your paragraphs. Each paragraph should clearly connect to the next to enhance coherence.
coherence and cohesion
Use more varied vocabulary and check for spelling errors. This will improve your lexical resource and overall readability.
task achievement
You have presented some relevant ideas and examples that highlight the advantages and disadvantages of large chain stores.
task achievement
Your discussion of both sides of the issue shows a balanced perspective, which is valuable in argumentative writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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