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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The line chart shows the numbers of members for five different activities which is film club, martial arts, amateur dramatics, table tennis and musical performances in Melbourne, Australia during 2000 to 2020, looking from an overall perspective, the film club make up the largest participants during these 20 years.

The line chart shows the numbers of members for five different activities which is film club, martial arts, amateur dramatics, table tennis and musical performances in Melbourne, Australia during 2000 to 2020, looking from an overall perspective, the film club make up the largest participants during these 20 years.
As
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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can be seen,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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table tennis had a soar increase which started from less than 20 to more than 50,
while
Linking Words
 amateur dramatics dropped slightly by almost 20 members from 2005. The musical performances
seems
Change the verb form
seem
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 to be built in 2005 and had a stable growth in these 15 years. The martial arts and the film club remained
in
Change preposition
apply
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the same, and the film club was the most popular
activities
Fix the agreement mistake
activity
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, which had almost 70 people during that time.

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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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