Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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People hold different views on whether it is preferable to accept negative situations,

such

Linking Words

as unsatisfying employment or financial hardness. or to actively seek improvements in these conditions.

While

Linking Words

some argue that

Wrong verb form

accepting

show examples

bad

situation

Fix the agreement mistake

situations

show examples

, I firmly believe that it is more beneficial to work for positive change. On one hand, accepting peace and stability can sometimes lead to pressure relief.

For instance

Linking Words

, individuals who

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

boring and hopeless

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

should accept the situation in order to avoid

further

Linking Words

unsatisfaction

Replace the word

dissatisfaction

show examples

and risk.

Moreover

Linking Words

, acceptance can promote stability, which could enable people to adapt and develop to better quality of life.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, actively working towards improving difficult circumstances can result in substantial personal growth. For

examples

Fix the agreement mistake

example

show examples

, myself is a perfect

support

Replace the word

supporter

show examples

of the above idea. When I was in high school, I did not get access to the top schools

due to

Linking Words

failure in the

entering

Replace the word

entrance

show examples

exam.

However

Linking Words

, I

want

Wrong verb form

wanted

show examples

a different career path,

Linking Words

Correct word choice

and as

show examples

a result, I made

decision

Add an article

the decision

a decision

show examples

to acquire advanced learning skills which

helps

Wrong verb form

helped

show examples

me to gain greater progress in the university entrance exam. In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

accepting negative circumstances might provide calmness,

however

Linking Words

, striving for improvement has more significant benefits. I strongly support taking active change to overcome difficulties rather than simply tolerating them.

xueran6918Thu Mar 20 2025

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coherence

Ensure that your introductory sentence clearly outlines both views before stating your own opinion.

cohesion

Make sure to use singular/plural forms correctly (e.g., 'individuals who have boring jobs').

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to strengthen your arguments, particularly in the second paragraph.

task achievement

The essay presents a clear opinion and addresses both sides of the argument.

coherence

The writing demonstrates an attempt to engage the reader with personal experience.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

210 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

adversity
resilience
stoicism
contentment
cope
adapt
endure
persevere
settle
ambition
tenacious
determined
resourceful
optimistic
self-improvement
proactive
initiative
transform
overcome
confront

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Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many criminals commit further crime as soon as they are released from prison. What do you think are the causes of this? What possible solutions can you suggest?

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages.

Growing up in the city is better for children's development, and it helps them have a good life later on compared to living in the village. Do you agree or disagree?