IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Thousands of
Use synonyms
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
show examples
 are using in all over the world. Some of the
languages
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are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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die out
due to
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 the limited number of individuals who use
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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. A host of progressives redeem that if some of the
languages
Use synonyms
 die, it
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
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 not
put
Verb problem
have
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 any major effect on the world and it would
helps
Change the verb form
help
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 to make
the
Correct article usage
apply
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lives easier with few
languages
Use synonyms
. I am fully agreed with the above notion which I will explore in the following paragraphs.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are multifarious reasons
that
Correct word choice
apply
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why
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
languages
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 more effective than more
languages
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. In
first
Add an article
the first
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 place, it is easier for people to communicate. To explain it, when there are
limited
Change the article
a limited
the limited
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 number of
languages
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 used in the world
then
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 multitudes can easily communicate with each other and express
the
Change the word
their
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 thoughts in
good
Change the article
a good
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 manner. For explain,
in
Change preposition
on
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daily
Correct article usage
a daily
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 basis, hundreds of foreigners
visiting
Wrong verb form
visit
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Golden
Correct article usage
the Golden
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 Temple in Amritsar Sahib but they do not know the history of that place. To know, the history of that place they hire a guide who can explain
about
Change preposition
apply
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it in their native
language
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 like English because they do not know the Punjabi
language
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.
As a result
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, fewer
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
languages
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 make
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
communication more effective. Considering the
above mentioned
Add a hyphen
above-mentioned
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 viewpoint,
the
Remove the article
apply
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another key point is that everyone
have
Change the verb form
has
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 a different pace of Learning. Some individuals catch
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
things easily
whereas
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 several take more time to learn. As every nation
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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their
Correct pronoun usage
its
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 own
language
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 as a primary
language
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so
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the native speakers can speak their
language
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 but it is really hard to learn a different
language
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 which is totally distinct from their own
language
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.
Due to
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 the different words used in the different
languages
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 can make the
language
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 difficult.
For instance
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, in French every word
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 two different meanings
according to
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 the usage like whether a person using the word in
male
Correct article usage
a male
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 context or in
female
Correct article usage
a female
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 context.
Hence
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, limited
languages
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 are better than
huge
Correct pronoun usage
huge ones
show examples
. In conclusion,
although
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 every
nations
Change to a singular noun
nation
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have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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their
Correct pronoun usage
its
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 own local
language
Use synonyms
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
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if there
are
Wrong verb form
were
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less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
languages
Use synonyms
then
Linking Words
 it would make
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
things easier
such
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 as communication, understanding
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
different cultures and many more.

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task achievement
The introduction states the author's position clearly, but it could benefit from a more nuanced thesis statement that outlines the key arguments to be discussed.
coherence and cohesion
Transitions between paragraphs and ideas could be improved for smoother flow. For example, use phrases like 'Furthermore' or 'Additionally' to link ideas more effectively.
task achievement
While some examples are relevant, providing more specific, detailed examples to flesh out the points would enhance clarity and depth in the argument.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure subject-verb agreement and proper grammatical structures to improve the overall quality of writing.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion and attempts to argue for the benefits of having fewer languages, addressing an important aspect of the topic.
task achievement
The use of practical examples, such as the reference to tourists at the Golden Temple, shows an application of the argument to real-world situations.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Linguistic diversity
  • Cultural heritage
  • Language extinction
  • Communication barrier
  • Linguistic imperialism
  • Endangered languages
  • Language revitalization
  • Monolingual
  • Multilingual
  • Language preservation
  • Homogenization
  • Language policy
  • Cultural assimilation
  • Intangible heritage
  • Indigenous languages
  • Globalization
  • Dialects
  • Localization
  • Language documentation
  • Digital archiving
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