Some people think that school children need to learn practical skills such as car maintenance or bank account management along with their academic subjects at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is argued that educational institutions need to integrate skilled courses in the curriculum to prepare students for life skills. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will explain why I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
statement.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the labour market is always in demand of skilled people
due to
Linking Words
the huge focus
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
educators on academic performance.
However
Linking Words
, knowledge is essential to build communities, trained professionals are required to implement
this
Linking Words
knowledge.
For example
Linking Words
, an engineer needs to study abstract math and physics, but
also
Linking Words
being well-trained is a must to build a successful career and
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
the market needs, which reflects positively on the community.
Secondly
Linking Words
, when learners can practice what they learn, they will improve not only their critical thinking abilities but
also
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
will elevate their problem-solving talents.
For instance
Linking Words
, students who enrolled in training in
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
accounting during their
studied
Replace the word
studies
show examples
are more likely to solve financial issues
smoothely
Correct your spelling
smoothly
, which
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
more productivity and
effeciacy
Correct your spelling
efficiency
in servises for customers and leads
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
successsful
Correct your spelling
successful
businesses. In conclusion, the high need for professionals would encourage school leaders to embrace real-life knowledge connections in all subjects,
This
Linking Words
will not only help students to understand the content but
also
Linking Words
help them to benefit their communities effectively.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Consider elaborating on the introduction to provide more context and clarify your position on the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to enhance the connection between ideas in your paragraphs for better flow; using linking words would help.
Coherence and Cohesion
Be careful with grammar and punctuation, revising areas where sentence structure can be improved would enhance clarity.
Task Achievement
You present a clear argument in favor of integrating practical skills in education.
Task Achievement
The examples you use to support your points are relevant and illustrate your argument well.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your conclusion effectively reinforces your main argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: