IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

One of your friends wants to apply for a job involving working with foreign teenagers. Write a letter of recommendation for him/her.

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Dear Sir, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 to recommend Sara for the proposed job opportunity, which is working with young youth from foreign countries. Sara is an excellent team player with good communication skills.
Moreover
Linking Words
, she speaks three languages: English, French, and Arabic. Which can serve your institution's needs to communicate with teenagers
who's
Correct your spelling
whose
show examples
 mother tongue is not English. I worked with Sara three years ago in the Mississauga Community Centre, and she showed a great model of punctuality and collaboration. Many thanks for considering my recommendation. Yours faithfully, Mike Maikw

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Task Achievement
Ensure the introduction clearly states the purpose of the letter more explicitly.
Coherence and Cohesion
Avoid starting a sentence with 'Which'. This should be revised to maintain grammatical correctness.
Task Achievement
Provide specific examples of Sara's skills in the context of working with teenagers.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider expanding the closing paragraph to reinforce your recommendation.
Positive Note
Strong interpersonal skills and ability to communicate in multiple languages are well highlighted.
Positive Note
Demonstrates a clear experience working with the candidate, enhancing credibility.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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